The musings of a grey haired, green eyed young man.

Exit 2010, Enter 2011.

2010-12-31T22:22:00.005+01:00

2010 has been an incredible year. Incredible in every sense of the word.

The experiences were diverse and unique but they all converged into one thing: They all made me a better man.

Top on the list is friendship and its value in my life. I remember I talked about trust and its value some time ago and I think it is intertwined with friendship too.

I am not going to sermonize about this.

I will make a case out of the picture above. Ibrahim Babangida and Mamman Vasta were mates and friends... Or so Vasta thought. IBB grew up in Vasta’s family house and they were mates in the army, best friends, got married to the same friends, Maryam and Ada.

He was IBB’s best man at his wedding and also god father to his daughter.. It was said that you could never see IBB without Vasta.

Vasta was a poet, very charismatic and a fine gentleman and we know how powerful charismatic military men are.

IBB was threatened by Vasta’s increasing popularity and shortly after, in March 1986 Mamman Vasta was accused of being the mastermind behind a phantom coup. He was hurriedly killed, his body dumped in a mass grave. Acid was poured on him, burnt his corpse, beyond recognition.

What is the essence of my story? In 2010, I learnt how friendship can quickly turn to enmity. I think as humans, we need to know what friendship means. So even if your friend is making more money than you do, please be happy for him / her. It is not beneficial to you if you wish him/her ill.

I learnt that Friendship is over rated and most people do not know the true meaning of friendship and what it entails. I think facebook deceived a lot of people into thinking that all the people listed as your “friend” on facebook are really your friends. I learnt that people can desert you at the slightest sight of challenge and vanish leaving behind years of attachment and history.

I learnt that the one friend that i have who I can actually count on is better than a thousand friends that i cannot rely on.

On another note, I learnt that everything is not as it seems. And that sometimes, you need to look beyond the face value of something or an issue to grasp it and have a better understanding of it.

I also learnt that nothing good really comes easy and when it looks too easy for someone, it is either undeserved and fraudulent or that person worked hard while others slept.

Nigeria is my country. I can only run my mouth to complain about the way things are and that until I take ownership, in whatever little way, I do not have the right to open my mouth and criticize anybody.

I learnt to tell the truth, no matter how little or inconsequential I think it is. This was a hard lesson.

I learnt to live my life one day at a time. OK. B will totally disagree with me on this. I am the first child and the breadwinner of my family. I worry a lot. I worry about my siblings’ school fees, popsie’s health, momsie and retirement, my rent, stuff and I pack everything together and I worry to the point that I am unable to sleep. But I realized one night in November when I was up by 2am thinking of things I was going to do in March 2011, that at that point: 2am, I was not going to be able to change anything until at least January 1^st 2011. So why worry?

I learnt that i could enjoy life by really being myself, warts and all.

I learnt just 5 minutes ago that life is very precious. More precious that we think it is.

All these i hope will help me in 2011.

On that note I wish you all a happy new year. God’s blessings always.

For my fellow countrymen who lost their lives this evening in the Mogadishu barracks bomb blast, and all those that did not see the end of this year, rest in peace. We will never forget you.

Every star needs a video!

2010-12-19T23:32:00.003+01:00

Hey Peeps!!!
Omo .. This post is a smash and grab..lol
Work is grueling.. a lot needs to be done and so little time.
Christmas is here and people are puttering about.
Trust Lagosians and shopping.. Balogun market is filled daily with shoppers... who are spending their entire year's sweat for one week of feasting.
lol.. to each his own..
I came on, mainly to pass on this info that i have that may benefit you or someone you know, or some who knows someone who knows you.. sha pass the message around.
Peace peeps!

Note, I was 30.. on december 16th..lol, still expecting that Canon D60 slr, the Ipad.. etc..lol

Bragging Rights Media presents the 'EVERY STAR NEEDS A VIDEO' Competition.

by Bragging Rights on Sunday, December 19, 2010 at 6:52am

BR_Media is very proud to present the 'EVERY STAR NEEDS A VIDEO' Competition. Open to every unsigned artist in Nigeria, this Competition aims to give one lucky artist the opportunity to shoot a world class music video for no more than the cost of production. A team of writers, directors and PR professionals will work with the winning artist from preproduction planning to post-production and promotion of the video*. With a focus on creative integrity, visual precision and dynamic story telling, the goal of this competition is to showcase the vast talent contained in the Nigerian entertainment industry while giving the deserving 'star-in-the-making' a chance to introduce themselves to the world via a aesthetically appealing Music Video. Go from Underground to 10/10, shikena!

*Rules and Regulations*

1. Eligibility: Open to Unsigned Artists in Nigeria. Age >15years old, all genre of music are welcomed.

2. Join BR on FB search-Bragging Rights or follow us on twitter @BR_Media,

3. Submit complete track with brief artist bio (including phone number and email) to BR via twitter DM or FB message

4. Artist may be nominated by a third party but nominated artist must be aware and willing to participate

5. Submissions and Nominations open January 1st 2011

6. Submissions and Nominations will close January 21st 2011

7. Five short-listed artists (from the available submissions) will be contacted via email and announced (on our FB page) on January 24th 2011

8. Voting opens once announcement is made - The public will be free to vote for their favorite track to win the video

9. Voting will continue for 2weeks.

10. Final decision = 50% Public votes + 50% BR Directors Vote

11. Winner will be announced February 7th 2011 (five days after voting closes)

12. Winner will be contacted via email.

13. Video must be shot in Lagos, Nigeria.

14. Winner will be charged only for cost of production (capped at N300,000)

15. BR will make no claims or rights of ownership to the participants music, sales of CD’s or profits from performances thereof.

16. BR (although under no contractual obligation) will promote the video to the extent determined by its members

17. The Project will be expected to be completed no later than 3months after a winner is announced.

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What is the value of trust?

2010-11-11T13:25:00.007+01:00

This post was inspired by B.
Thank you for being patient enough to re- teach me things i thought i knew, and for being honest with me.
For bringing light to my dark places.
I love you.

So, after so much promises to B (I am sure she must have come here and probably left disappointed) that I was going to post, I finally do.

Yay me! Lol

I think that is one more thing to work on - procrastination.

If I could show you my draft, filled with half finished drafts… you will fling a strong tufiakwa +ah ah!! at me.

A lot is happening in Naija, some directly affecting me, others not so directly.

Next year is an election year and all the aspirants are gearing up to contest.
Each with different strategies, plans and campaign focus. So far GEJ has been the most interesting: his fb page has been a bee hive of activities. Young people daily throng there; some to really check and confirm if GEJ really replies comments, some to take serious pot shots at the poor man, some others try to get noticed, who knows they can be invited to Aso rock for one special assistant position like that and some others with just a warped morbid curiosity. I think I belong to this last group.

I don’t trust politicians.

Simple and short.

I don’t trust them because I have been betrayed times without numbers. Even way back in the university, during the student union elections, you vote someone in, once they got in, they turned around and invited their confraternity brothers, who accompanied them on regular power binges.

So, forgive me if my trust is not on auto.

GEJ looks like a cool dude, but..errrr..

I don’t trust GEJ, IBB, Ribadu, certainly not Momodu… none.

Saw a funny joke about them this morning on fb and I retweeted it on twitter..

2011; collect IBB’s money, sympathise with Ribadu, advise Buhari, reject Gusau, ignore Atiku, forget Momodu and wish the rest G O O D L U C K. lol

Fact is that we have to vote someone in, and so far none is looking serious enough, for an election that is happening next year. I saw an interview on my friend's blog that Dele Momodu granted Sahara reporters.. sigh.. Where do I begin from? He was tactless and lacked a presidential mien. He couldn’t handle the interviewer’s succinct questions. All he did was huff, puff and drop names. I was just disappointed and I will leave you to form your opinions.

But I don’t trust them oooo

By the way…

What is the value of trust?

I have asked myself this question, for days unending.

Can one really quantify trust?

Can it be valued.. like say Mr A’s trust is worth 5k, is Mr B’s trust worth more?

Trust is simply the confident expectation of something… also the process of relying on someone for something.

Whatever the different meanings, they all involve vulnerability and placing confidence in a certain person, people or system for very personal things that you wouldn't normally trust anyone else with.

I don’t want to go all scholarly but I will come from a personal point of view.

When we talk about trust, it is usually associated with personal relationships. But honestly, it is more than that: business relationships, political relationships etc

I have been in a few relationships where trust was essential.. business, personal relationships.

I noticed that the relationship started soundly as soon as basic trust was established. Basic trust by the way, is a normal level of trust that everyone deserves until they do something to break the trust.

I also noticed that as we kept the trust, we got to a point that more trust was needed to advance to the next level of the relationship. Usually, the required level of increased trust seeps in automatically; a world congress is not called to say “ err.. we have reached stage one, oya, let’s bring more trust to the table”.

No.

It comes automatically for so many reasons.

Eg, I vote for Mr A into office based on what he promised he was going to do… four years down the line, he has delivered on his promises and he comes again campaigning for a higher office; I look at the fact that he kept his promises so he is worthy of my trust to a certain extent so I give him my vote.

Most Nigerian politicians enter public offices and they throw the trust straight out of the first window that they see and four years after, they come back to try to hood wink us again.

“I will water and fire all of you!”

“I will fly the entire country to the moon”

Really?

Do I have ‘ODE’ printed on my forehead?

In personal relationships, the issue of trust is a bit more errr …personal.

In my opinion, it is the beginning and end of a relationship.

When people in a relationship enjoy what they expected to, they are motivated and galvanized to add more trust to keep the relationship going.

You also realize that when there is trust, you save a lot of energy, asking questions in order to seek reassurances, arguing in order to drive home your point… point is.. where there is trust, some things need not to be said.

Some people also realize early that trust is generative, like a wildfire. Once established, it seeps into every cranny and nook of the relationship and before you know it, it spreads because quite frankly, trust brings trust. And if it becomes contagious, it builds fantastic relationships and friendships.

So it is safe for me to say trust is an awfully important aspect in a relationship.

But we need to remember that trust is an action or series of actions, not just a feeling.

Trust doesn’t just happen. It arises from the way people choose to interact. It should not be left to chance. Nothing good comes by chance

Now, there are people who have trouble trusting, due to hurt, abuse, betrayal, or constant disappointments especially in their early life, and subsequently they built up protective walls around themselves. They will tell you it is a lot easier to close off and shut down, any day, anytime.

I have been privy to some people who want to let go but somehow, it is like they scarred for life.

Hell!, what I am even talking about?

I have been hurt, put down in the most blatant of ways. My trust, smashed to pieces on the altar of selfishness, and a whimsical, retarded reason, excuse given to placate me and somehow make it ok.

But it didn’t. I had to decide to rise from the ashes.

But I swore to myself, that it will be very unfair to carry that hurt to a new relationship. That is a recipe for a concentrated failure.

I worked on me. I took time out to rediscover me. I found my strengths and weakness. I understood myself, found out what worked for me and what didn’t. I knew me better and I began to trust me and invariably my decisions.

The more I trusted myself, the easier I found it to reveal myself to other people, and the easier it was to figure out what promises I can make that I can actually keep.

With my openness and confidence, people were drawn to me and fresh friendships and relationships were forged. Shortly after, I met B, and I was into her like perfectly fitted cashmere gloves.

Some people will tell me that it is easier said than done, but the truth is that if you desire a meaningful relationship, there is no other way.

While people are worried about their trust being violated, they must also check themselves and make sure that they don't violate anyone else's trust.

Trustworthiness is a two way street. No one is automatically trustworthy. Yet a lot of people expect to be trusted when they themselves are openly distrusting.

Even with all these, regretfully, I have still broken a few trusts.

So I can say with all seriousness that it helps to follow certain practices to maintain and grow trust

It’s hard to measure the value of trust in a relationship but most of us will know the cost of losing it.

Trust is created – or destroyed – by our actions. The simplest and most important of these is our ability to keep the promises we make.

Another vital process in building trust is how we manage the inevitable conflicts that arise in any relationship. There have been cases where I had been hardly constructive when having a disagreement with B. I am learning to handle the conflicts but I still slip up and mess up. Maybe that is why she is blessed with the type of patience she has.. because if she was impatient, tory for don change

What’s needed is a willingness to acknowledge conflict and engage constructively, rather than pretending it’s not there.

She tells me that it is good we disagree sometimes. I used to disagree to that but I am beginning to see that arguments and disagreements can be the hallmark of an honest relationship – the key is to have them in a civilized manner and make sure they are processed, not suppressed.

People are bound to reveal their vulnerabilities more freely with those whom they have built close trusting relationships. These vulnerabilities include but are not limited to anger, pain, doubt. When trust is present they can be themselves and more authentic, and they don’t feel the need to posture or pretend.

In a trusting relationship people feel that they can rely on each other and count on one another when they need to vent or get a different perspective.

Where there is no trust, rather than a handshake around an agreement, people read the fine print of these agreements, often imputing false motives and taking more time and effort to form different opinions and views from normal conversations.

If and when problems do occur, rather than solving them together quickly, both parties play the blame game and wait for the other to fix it.

Trust takes time to build, but it is fragile and easily broken.

Being imperfect, I have made several mistakes and in the process I have hurt B. I have realized that if I had been candid about some of my comments by saying what I meant, being empathetic and compassionate, show appreciation when necessary, listen… listen (this is awfully important guys.. and ladies too), I would have saved her a lot of pain and a lot of grief and lonely moments for me.

Admitting mistakes and apologizing quickly is also very important. The more it drags on, the worse it gets.

To spread it broadly, this applies to our politicians too. If they could just listen to us, compassionate, admit their mistakes, not necessarily to us and take quick steps to remedy the situation, among other things, things would be a lot better.

So.. it is time to check ourselves..

Do we know the value of trust?

Do we need to readjust and realign?

Home and abroad

2010-03-02T22:19:00.002+01:00

Hey people...lol
whats good?
February was crazy..mainly cos work was tough..we launched a lot of promotions to grab a chunk of the market..then I started my project management classes. Damn!! its hard joooo. At some point, I wondered how I ended up in that class...I told B, expecting some sympathy..the girl just pushed me back into the class..lol
I am beginning to get a hang of it tho'.

On valentine's day, B surprised me. In a way I have never been surprised me..
I will blog about it later

I want to talk about the argument I had with my mates about ladies in Nigeria and the ladies outside Nigeria...the argument was so heated and contentious. Some were of the opinion that babes in Naija were different and better, while some argued that it was the other way around..I don't want to talk too much..cos I came across an article by a friend of mine, that captured the dynamics of that argument... I actually borrowed the title of this post from the title of the article. Pls read and let me know what you think..

*************************************************************************************

It was a carnival in Aguda, Surulere. The street was lit up with Christmas lights and a makeshift stage was show casing some of Nigeria’s up and coming artists. In the corner, the suya man was grilling gizzards, tomatoes and onions. I could spot my order at the top right hand corner quietly roasting away in the fiery heat. The crowd was beginning to gather and somewhere on Akinyele Street, a young girl was meeting her boyfriends’ friends for the first time. She was a hit! To them she was unpretentious, down-to-earth, and mostly normal. Very unlike the prissy ‘American’ they had expected when their friend announced his new girlfriend was coming to town. They talked casually for a few minutes but of course, like magic, when two or more Nigerians are gathered, they end up talking about only one thing, Nigeria; politics, soccer, the economy, marriage or something of the sort. On this particular night, the topic of discussion was none other than: girls (I was outnumbered, 5 guys to little ol’me) and the question posed was as such: what is the difference between a Nigerian girl living in Nigeria, versus one that lives in the states? And if given a choice (all other factors held constant), whose wine would you carry? Now, I know the politically correct response is that 'it depends on the girl' and ‘it's what’s inside that counts’. We all know this to be true. However, I've come to realize that the packaging matters a lot too. How a 'gift' is wrapped almost gives a clue as to how special the package actually is. Keyword: almost. Give a girl a tiny blue box that says tiffany on it and see how she squeals in excitement before even opening it (little does she know that the box only has earrings and not that ring she's been fasting and praying for). It is a conditioned response, Pavlov’s experiment at its finest. Who no want beta thing?! But we need to remember that the packaging of the gift depends on the store…different stores equal different gift wrapping abilities. However, a shoe is a shoe is a shoe and the gift wrap doesn’t change the quality of the gift itself. So is there really a basis for comparison: Yankee versus Naija? There are fundamental characteristics that are imposed on us by virtue of our geographical location that creates an attitudinal change from the norms we are accustomed to. In an attempt to adapt, we find a new baseline, a new mean and the nurture part of the equation kicks in. Over years, these differences accumulate and become glaringly clear.

It is always incredibly interesting when I visit Nigeria and observe the social norms that preside. Before I go on, I should explain certain things. I moved to America at a relatively young age (at least too young to have had any significant conversation with boys) so I wasn’t well initiated into the Nigerian dating scene before I left. Therefore, you can say my dating rituals are more ‘American’ than anything else and as they say, America is the great leveler. Everyone here is equal; At least us immigrants. You come here and no one has to define ‘hard work’ for you. Whether you are on an academic hustle or getting enough jobs to keep you above water, everyone here works hard towards something tangible (except for those that don't in which case this article isn't for them anyway cause they have nothing to offer). My point is, in America, you are forced to be independent! You can live with your parents and still pay rent (almost unheard of in Nigeria, unless you are supporting your family), you can own your own car and pay for it yourself (you are not automatically a ‘big girl’ because you own an automobile), pay your own bills, buy your own hair and so on. As a result, you develop this 'I can do bad all by myself' mentality; you become the feared and revered ‘independent woman’. This is your new baseline, your new truth. Thus when such a woman goes out with a man (with the exception of d first date because I believe men should always pay for the first date!), it’s perfectly normal to split the check (or pay the whole thing), or leave the tip, pay for the snacks or something! Anything to show that you can hold your own (granted, $20 for a movie isn’t earth shattering but the little things count). We women are after all 'liberated' and should act as such.

However, I come to Nigeria and realize that it is the only country I can visit with less than $200 in my pocket and have a swell time for weeks on end. Guys JUMP at the opportunity to buy you anything you want. If they are ‘scoping’ you, they send recharge card to your phone before you wake up. You go to dinner and they feel insulted if you even ask to glance at the bill (talk less of bringing out your credit card). You go to club and they don't let your glass empty. Like TI said 'you can have whatever you like'. Now, I might be slightly stretching the truth about the niceties of our young men (after all there is no such thing as a free lunch) but there is no denying that they have been raised to believe that their meat is in their financial capacity. Their worth is only as deep as their pocket. They dance to the music we ladies play and they know or rather, believe that no 'nicely packaged' girl would go for them if they have an empty pocket. Please note that this phenomenon is not Nigeria-specific. All around the world, even in animals, females want a male that is a provider; a hunter and gatherer of all wealth and resources that can be gotten. No one wants to be hungry, man must wack. However, in a country like Nigeria, this survival mentality is taken to a whole new level. There is a fundamental (or mental) problem when you take a girl out on a first date, she orders 2 bottles of wine, and immediately puts one in her purse to take home (true story!). Or when a girl thinks it is ‘standard’ to demand N100k Brazilian hair from a guy she’s barely dating as part of her upkeep! Or when it is not ‘ok’ for a young single guy to confess that he is indeed broke. That should not be normal behavior.

There’s something that happens when you work hard for your money and unfortunately, a large number of our home grown girls are stripped of the opportunity to earn that confidence and self-reliance through hard work.

No, the roads of America are not paved with gold but there is a system in place that allows you to be a self sustaining, fully functional woman. And that is a beautiful thing. You don't have to have cash on hand or huge sums in the bank to go to school (you can go on your merit or get a loan). You don't need connections to get a decent job, your qualifications can speak for you. You are not harassed by lecturers to pass a course, you are not ridden by darkness at night or systematic extortion by day, and thus, you can actually focus and thrive. I can go on and on. So many things about this country (America) makes your back straight (especially as a woman) and suddenly, when you go back home to Nigeria, people can smell the confidence on you...e dey ooze from your body. And there's nothing wrong with that.

However, when you 'grow up' in a system where the above is the direct opposite, then the hustle becomes different. Having a car becomes a status symbol, you have to ‘settle’ lecturers with money in order not to be sexually harassed, jobs opportunities as a student (and even a graduate) are limited so you end up being dependent on your parents (who might be willing but incapable of carrying you along) or anyone who is willing. The constant outstretching of hands becomes your primary means of getting things done and soon enough, you start demanding N1000 credit from men you barely know and stashing bottles of wine in your purse on first dates. It’s a sad thing that happens and I blame the government. Women like this eventually end up being the shiniest gift of all…they become trophies that can be collected and traded and bought with money amongst pot bellied rich old men; men that are all too ready to keep them as shiny and as polished as possible, (almost) at all cost.

The dance continues.

As I ate my gizzard suya and the boys became rambunctious on their third bottle of big stout, one of them blurted out the prevailing misconception that most 'American' Nigerian or ‘Foreign exchange’ girls are spoilt. He stated that as much as they have gained a level of independence by being able to take care of themselves and handle their business, they've become 'lost' to tradition and culture. They refuse to cook or attend to their traditional feminine roles in the relationship to the extent that it becomes a struggle for control of the relationship or household. They come back cocky, pretentious and condescending, believing that our homegrown men are only trying to get at them for papers and greener pastures. At this point, the debate became heated and it became apparent that could argue forever! After all, there are girls in Nigeria who really 'can do bad' all by themselves, but quite honestly, they are few and far between and in most cases, still hide their liberation in the presence of moet and champagne bottles.

Pop, pop, pop!

When it comes down to it, I've realized that the real comparison is not between the homegrown and the foreign exchange. It comes down to the definition of a good woman (a gift), regardless of where and how she's packaged. There are vases and there are pots. If you are Igbo, then you know of the traditional pot udu that is made of clay and used to store water. That pot keeps water cold even in 90degree weather. The pot itself is as plain as can be but it can last for years on end if it is treated gently. Its function is just as vital as a heart in a diabetic man. A vase on the other hand may not be as functional or vital, but it is beautiful, brings calm and remains just as loyal when treated with care. A good woman therefore is a hybrid between the udu and a vase. Some are more udu, some are all vase. An udu from America may turn out to be the best thing since sliced bread, plain as toothpick but strong and fearless regardless; just as a vase from Enugu might be an antique, a rare and priceless gem whose worth is beyond measure. Either way, they all need tender loving care to stay beautiful and functional for years to come and that my friends, is the koko of the matter.

Two weeks, later.......

2010-02-23T00:19:00.007+01:00

I had postponed this post several times.
More than 7 times, I think.
I gave myself reasons to write this post.
Then I gave myself reasons not to.
Both set of reasons were viable.
In my daily to do list, I had shifted it twice.
I had written the post twice and I had deleted them.
It seemed as if everyone had gone away to twitter....and it was funny because 99% of bloggers who migrated to twitter did so with their blog Ids. It was as if that was an extension of blogville. I was content to read their tweets, and pop an occasional hi or retweet their tweets.
Most times, I would come on blogsville, read posts and comments and make my exit.
I also felt blogsville was now a status thingy. I was seeing a lot of new faces i wasn’t feeling. A lot of half -assed comments.
Maybe i am just being selfish and defensive of what i was proud to call our own. It used to be our community.
Now, I really don’t know... I guess change is inevitable.

What is happening in my life?
A lot .
A whole lot.
The last post i put up was a day after B came back.
From the 29th of December, until now, my life has been a whirlwind of some sorts.
A first class flight to destinations i had never been to.

I spent the entire Christmas with her, getting to know her and bond with her. We were cooped up together for the first four days, not really going out. Then I met her brothers, and it was ok.

Normally, I am a bit wary about brothers, especially if she is an only girl. I know brothers are usually fiercely protective of their only sisters.. I know for a fact that my brother and I are fiercely protective of our sister.
So when I met them, and they were ok with me, I heaved a sigh of relief.

I found out that she loved pink, as much as she loved blue.

I found out that she didn’t have any favorite scent.

She found out that I loved “swallow” a lot... a day without it felt very odd.

She found out sometimes I was a speed demon...lol

She also found that when I got very excited, I spoke very fast. Very fast.

How she threw her head back when she sang...

How she hunched over when she drove...

I found out how her hands felt in mine.

How my arms molded her waist.

How her lips felt..soft and moist.

How her eyes softened when she looked at me....

She took me to her side of the city...

I let her view my side of the city.

She saw what’s good.

She fed me gizzard and chicken suya from her favourite suya place, by the waters in lekki...

I introduced her to Olaiya at Shitta, designer rice, and sharwama from the world famous Sharwama place on Randle street...

It was the best time of my life.

I withstood the mainland to the island traffic every day.

It was nothing to me. I was energized each time I saw her.

I met her dad and I was cheesing hard.

I was like a little kid. I was excited.

My face shone like a thousand bright lights.

She was happy..very happy.

She told me that.

I knew I was thoroughly in love.

I was gushing.

So much, somebody asked me if it was ok for a man to gush.

I didn’t know... I mean some of the emotions I was feeling for the first time.
They had not been awakened before; I never knew I had them.

All of a sudden, the floodgates crashed open and emotions, different emotions came piling out.

I managed them as much as I could.

My mates imagined her to be stuck up and forming “yankee”..like most yankee and jand babes, they have had contact with. We argued about this and we finally agreed that it was not always that way.
She scored massive brownie points..no flyer miles ...lol when she came and she was very cool with them. I realized that guys will always be cool with ladies that were laid back and no airs. Generally the way guys are. Afterwards, I got compliments like...she is a keeper..if you not my dude, i for break your finger for that job etc...Omo, you don marry oooo
I met her uncles, one of her aunts and her family.
She met my close friends who are the closest thing to a family I have in Lagos.
One of them who is not easily impressed was impressed.
End of story!
It was strange seeing her every day, doing stuff with her.
She was no longer that voice over the phone, or the face in those photos. She was there beside me, and as the days went by, I was apprehensive that she was going to go soon and I was not looking forward to that.
We tried to do a lot within the little time that we had.
Fast forward to two weeks later.... Departure hall, Murtala Mohammed airport...her bags have already been checked in, and we were waiting for her to board....
It hit me that in a matter of hours, she would be gone.
I panicked .
I think it showed on my face.
She held my hands, asked me to close my eyes and she said a prayer, asking God to keep us and preserve our love and relationship.
Halfway, her voice choked, and her hold became tighter.
I fought the knot in my throat.
When her boarding call made..she didn’t want to let go.
She promised me she was mine...
I fought back the tears.
Before she went in, she caught my eyes...I saw the expectancy. I smiled at her.
That was the last mental picture I had.

Our relationship has grown in leaps and bounds..not without misunderstandings and disagreements.
But every day is a blessing and we are grateful for it.
We are thankful for the trust and communication..very essential.
Yesterday, she told me I was her second chance at love...
I told her she was my only chance.
She said I am the prayer that she made without moving her lips....
Well...what can I say?

I am not back. That is a tall order..
But I will blog one day at a time.
One step before the other.
Until i find my rhythm again.

What’s up blogville?

The meeting.

2009-12-29T07:03:00.000+01:00

10.12pm, 28th december 2009, lekki, lagos, Nigeria, I saw and subsequently kissed B for the first time; roughly 4 months after we fell in love. Finally my christmas is taking shape. I am out! Lol

The birth

2009-12-16T06:59:00.003+01:00

On a windy Tuesday morning, 29 years ago, a young mother gave birth to a bouncing baby boy who weighed in at an impressive 4kg. She had been in labour for more than 4 days, with the doctor telling her each time that she had to go and come back because she was not ready. Two days ago, she had sent word to her young husband who was writing his final degree exams at the University of Nigeria, Nsukka that the baby was ready to come out but had simply refused to come. As soon as he dropped his pen, her husband, Chukwuemeka hurriedly packed his sparse belongings. Amidst snickers from hostel mates who conversed in low voices on how “mekus signed away his freedom by getting married”, he gathered his wardrobe of 3 pairs of jeans, 4 shirts and his corduroy jacket and threw them into a sling bag.
He heard them. He saw the looks, the mocking stares. He took them in his stride. All that mattered to him were his dear Ihuaku, and his lovely baby who was on its way. He hurried out of the hostel, caught a bus to the park and boarded a late wagon to
Owerri. Stuffed in between a fat woman who smelled of stale mangala fish and a couple who kept whispering into each other’s ears, he was lost in a train of thoughts: what name to call the baby, wait! Wait! before the name, what will the baby be? Male or female? Will the baby be fair like him or caramel like Ihuaku? These thoughts preoccupied him as the car hurtled towards Owerri at a break neck speed.
At about 9.15pm, he alighted from the bus and chartered a cab straight to the Okpara Nursing home where his wife was waiting to see if this was the night. At the waiting room, he saw his mother in law, nda Uche, who has been a surrogate mother to him. Since his mother died prematurely in 1963, this was the closest he had come to having a mother. His mother in law filling in that space for him? How lucky was that?
He was told that he could see Ihuaku and he was taken in by the nurse. The moment she saw him, looks of consternation and pain turned to a very bright, almost blinding smile. Once again, Chukwuemeka was reminded why he fell in love with her immediately he set eyes on her, when he was sent as a young teacher to the central primary school in her village. He kissed her and held her. “it’s ok… I am here now, my love” he assured her.
That was two days ago.
Two days later, she was still in labor
He was at the hospital when Nda Uche suggested he goes home to catch some rest. He had been pacing back and forth in the arrival room. She was already a veteran of childbirths, and having witnessed a lot of other women give birth, she was a lot more calmer than he was. She understood; this was his real first childbirth, the still birth previously was not to be counted. That was a bad ‘chi’.
As soon as he got home, he realized he was still wearing the same jeans from Sunday evening. Pulling them off, he plunked down on d couch and in a matter of minutes, he was snoring away.
As real as daylight, he saw his father in law, fondly called Okongwu, who passed on seven months ago. He came to him while he was lying on the couch and shook him up roughly.
‘’what are you doing here, is this how you are going to welcome me?’’ he asked in his normal booming voice
‘’get up and get to the hospital, I am almost there and you are here sleeping’’
Chukwuemeka woke up with that voice clear in his ears. It was no secret that Okongwu loved Ihuaku dearly. But what did he mean by that: that he was on his way? He looked at the clock: 5.27am, three hours after he started sleeping.
By this time, his eyes were clear and hurriedly dressed up, in those same jeans and grabbed a taxi to the hospital.
As he stepped in, he ran into his sister in law, Ngozi at the door,
‘’who told you?’’ she excitedly asked ‘’nda m has given birth to a baby boy’’
Chukwuemeka face broke out in a wide grin, running inside, he went straight to the room and saw his wife, looking tired and spent. She smiled weakly at him and nodded her head in the direction of the cot. As Chukwuemeka peeped in and saw the cutest baby boy he has ever laid his eyes on, nda Uche whispered into his ears,’’my husband has come back to me. Okongwu has reincarnated in your son’’.
He instantly remembered what Okongwu told him, ‘’…..is this how you are going to welcome me?………..I am almost there’’
Several emotions ran through him at the same time: gratitude, pride, love and he looked up and said a simple prayer.
‘May my son be greater than me, O God”

I was born today, 29 years ago.

Thanksgiving

2009-11-26T17:53:00.000+01:00

In my country..Nigeria, the thanksgiving day is not our culture. I mean we give thanksgiving every sunday at church..right? But with my interaction with people who live in the US, I have come to understand how important thanksgiving is to them.
As I live this life, I am coming to terms with the fact that thanksgiving is not a favour that you are doing to God. It is not something that you do when you want to or when you feel like. Sometimes, I am so worried about stuff that I don't thank God for the seemingly obvious things such as life, family, good health etc..taking them for granted, I worry about the car that I don't have yet, the almost non existent love life, that holiday trip etc. I mean we can worry right? But not to the point that we forget to be thankful for the ones we have been blessed with.
Meeting my love interest, whom I'll call B, created that awareness for thanksgiving. Each time we spoke, she always thanked God for one thing or the other, even when it wasn't in her favor. She will simply say"thank God, cos he doesn't start what he can't finish" and she leaves it at that.
So today, I just want God to know that even though, I don't show him how grateful and thankful that I am..that I am really thankful.

I am thankful to all the people that God has used to bless me. God bless you all.
I am thankful for my family, even tho' at times, their demands may seem incessant and unending; I love them to death nonetheless, and I will never swap them for any other.
I am thankful for the little things that God shows me daily..they are giving rise to the big things..
I am thankful for the days of little beginings..they motivate me to work harder and I will look back at them with pride because they will help me to the top..
I am thankful for life..with that comes hope which is never ending..and it gives me the strenght to go head to head with tomorrow..
I am thankful for the priviledge to be thankful..I need God's grace to be thankful daily.
I am thankful for August 1st 2009, for second chances and fresh starts..

While speaking with B earlier today, she told me this:

I am thankful for u for coming into my life unexpectedly...and suddenly... and for coming back after u ran away,lol.
I like to think u ran away...and came back because I was pulling u back to me even without pulling u..lol and I think its romantic.
I'm greatful for our friendship. U r the only one that knows everything there is to know...everyone else knws bits n pieces...
I'm grateful that u r ur sweet, easy going self
when i have a baby...i want him to b just like u
lol
make his mum so happy n proud
Because of u I'm always early to work now and I'm strangely slightly closer to ma family
I have faith in love again...and my fears r melting away.
Because of u i moved a mountain:
lol
switching my schedule was no small feat,but i did it cause I knew the reward would b greater than any stress...
I'm greatful that u r u and i wouldnt have it any other way.

B had to switch her schedule and pull double shifts to be able to come see me.
I am very thankful..like mahd thankful!
As we celebrate thanksgiving, I wish we will take deeper looks around and within us and we will realize that we have enough reasons to be thankful..not only on thanksgiving day..but everyday of our lives.
Happy thanksgiving and sallabrations, folks!

A comeback, a romance and a basketful of eggs.

2009-11-10T09:08:00.002+01:00

Hmmm......apologies, apologies. My sincerest apologies.
I promised Juiceegal and BSNC that I was back to stay.

I don’t know what happened..I just got all tied up.
Work, work, work, twitter, work, writing, facebook, poetry meets, romance and all of a sudden, yahoo chat became very, very interesting.
There was one form of training or the other almost every other week at work. Then we had a promotional campaign with the biggest prize money in Africa: 1 million USD, which didn’t generate interest at first because of the normal cynicism of an average Nigerian who argued that it was impossible for someone to win that amount of money. Halfway through the promotion, after tens of thousands had won 48 mobile phones, every day for 90 days, the cynics sat up and began to take notice.
Someone, a 20 year old, 400 level medical student at Unijos won the 1 million USD on Friday the 6th of November, 2009. Someone, whose life is changed forever, I dare to suppose. Even his generations to come may enjoy the windfall of his singular decision to invest in a sim card which I am sure he bought for 200 naira.
If we knew how our day to day decisions affect our lives, the lives of people around us and the lives of future generations to come, I am sure we will be more careful when we make decisions, even the very simple and little ones.

It is November and the year is almost gone. Yesterday morning, I woke up at 4.25am and took almost 30 minutes to take stock of the year.
Most of the bad habits I have dropped, a few of the career decisions I have not met. In that aspect, it was as if the year conspired with time and went too fast in attempt to deny me the realization of my dreams. Well, I am still living and that I am so grateful for and surely by his grace, I will live to fight another day.
Friendships have been made, some have been marred. I have had joys and ups and I have had lows and sad times too, but it is all good though.

It is so funny when you meet someone, and there is some sort of upheaval in your life. Probably, you used to be in control of your emotions, like seriously in control. You had well made fences, emotions locked up: To gain access to your heart, she had to find an ancient scroll, do a bit of harry potteresque magic in order to find a key to unlock one chamber and there were like 12 chambers before you get to the final one housing the heart.
I had this carefree, couldn’t care less attitude towards love and relationships..at least since my last break up. That attitude helped me not to get emotionally involved and attached to anyone. The moment it got so hot and heavy, I would lose interest; how convenient that was for me.. Lol
Then I met someone, in the most random of manners. I didn’t talk to her again until after some 30 days..I think.
When we spoke again, my life was turned upside down and inside out too. I was attracted to her...more than a fair amount, if I am allowed to say so. We started talking regularly, on the phone, yahoo chat, fb etc. The one thing...not really an issue but a bit of a concern was that she lived in another country.
I have never done an LDR before; I never really believed in it. I have always been an expressive person, so I loved the proximity so I could do my PDAs lol. At some point, I didn’t care that she lived in another country. I just felt good each time we talked and I looked forward to the next time we would talk.
This is the third month, I have not seen her physically yet, but I am having the best time of my life. I have never had this good. It is amazing and I am trying hard not gush (I am a grown man for Pete’s sakes!!! Lol) but I am very happy and content. We are getting to know each other, one step at a time. I am having those feelings you get when you know you are in love, feelings that most men try to cover up because they feel it will make them feel less than men if they show the fact that men have butterflies in their tummies too. A mail from her and there is this mad movement in my tummy.
I am giving it my best shot.
Because i want it to have the best chance at being successful.

On the other hand,
There is a trend that I am beginning to see in Lagos:
The art of not putting your eggs in one basket.
Normally, it is a rule of life, not to put your eggs in one basket, I mean it ensures that you have a plan b, to fall back on in case anything goes wrong, right?
I don’t know how nice it is to have a backup plan in relationships. A lot of people I know are doing that. The ladies say that it ensures that the guy is kept on his toes and in check if he knows that there is competition lurking around in the background. They also reasoned that it paid to have one because you could fall back on it if it fails with the main dude.
Almost same with the males, except that for the males, 5 out of 10 situations he is hanging out with the main lady and the back up at the same time.
In my opinion, I think having a backup is insincere and shows that the individuals involved believe that their relationship is doomed from the start and will not last, hence the art of not putting your eggs in one basket and it sucks... just my opinion ooo.
What do you think?
Right or wrong?

Much ado about MARRIAGE.

2009-10-03T22:22:00.000+01:00

It is has been a crazy week. First, another friend of mine got married...lol making it four this year...whatever!
Something more personal happened... I will talk about it in the coming weeks>
I think I am going back to school...a masters degree is in order.
I will do it probably at Unilag...i will hold onto this job joo while I do it.

Is marriage a bit overated?
Is it the next logical thing to do after you graduate and probably get a job?
If you are not married at a certain age, does it mean that you are not successful?
Do you just marry anyone or some random person, because you are single and a greater percentage of your mates are married?
Is it right to discriminate against someone who is not married? Especially, ladies who are not married are largely percieved as "incomplete" despite the fact that most of them are successful throroughbred professionals in their chosen fields?

This has largely been on my mind since a friend posted something that mirrored my thought pattern on facebook. In my opinion, justice was not done to it in terms of constructive contributions and opinions. Most of the comments bordered on the personal, asking the poster not to worry that marriage and love will come. I am a man..I am not scared of marriage..lol actually I want it more than Mum does..lol but the fact is that seperations and consequently divorce is on the rise in Lagos..at least I know that. People do not stay up to 1 year..sometimes, less than that.. is it that people are marrying for the wrong reasons? What happened to all right reasons and values that kept marriage sacred?
Someone opined that marriage during the times of our parents was better and lasted because parents arranged them...i.e families did "arrangee" marriage for the kids.. I countered that because people especially ladies are more aware now. They know what they want and they go for it....so you can't arrange someone for me when I am not attracted to the person or the person is not my type.
Anyways.. let me know what you think.

The angry mango!
Share
Wednesday, 23 September 2009 at 14:36
‘If you help me see Ego, make you tell am I don go oh’

It is 6am in the morning and the sound of my ‘Djinee-Ego’ ring tone is blasting in my ear. I look up and it says ‘mummy’ on the caller ID…I click reject and go back to sleep! I’ll call her later…maybe …maybe not. I love my mum. LOVE her. She’s the strongest woman I know. Hard-working, entrepreneurial, all that…but lately…this fine woman has been obsessed with asking me about the “latest” in my love life. I mean…where did this come from?! I can understand that she wants to know what’s up but I fear oh! This was the same woman that didn’t want to use her 2 eyes to see any fine young man greet me talk less about take me out on dates (date gini?). Suddenly, me, her post-graduate 20-something year old daughter is ripe and apparently ready to be plucked. The time has come for me to present ‘the one’ for all to see and behold. Ta-Da. Magic!
As in…do I smell?! Am I dimpling on my sides? Abi is my skin oozing fruity, sweet tasting liquid? When did I become ripe and in the name of all things good…how can I slow down this ripening process?! I feel like a mango abi na pawpaw?!?!!?!? Which one?

I sat, pondering all these things on my bus ride back from work…and the crux of my irritation at the incessant probing came to me...What’s the big deal?!!! is getting married an accomplishment?!

Compare two 28 year old women…one a young lawyer, working, self-sufficient, happy; the other a newly married young professional mum with a one-year old son, happy; who has accomplished more?

I had to look up the dictionary definition of what an accomplishment or achievement really is.

Achievement (n): Recognition granted to a learner when all required learning outcomes have been successfully demonstrated

Accomplish (n): To finish successfully; To complete, as time or distance; To bring to an issue of full success; to effect; to perform; to execute fully

A musician is highly skilled. A painter, sculptor, a researcher, an accountant…any sort of professional…are all highly skilled. They have learned and been trained to do what they do…devoted time and sweat and energy to their craft and such, they have achieved something. They have earned that special designation: MD, MSc, or whatever. A war veteran has achieved something…they’ve put their life in danger for the good and in service of others…they deserve that honor…that badge or medal, heck that pension. That being said, this note is for whom-ever deems it applicable to their life (especially us beautiful, single ladies). It’s going to be short and sweet and I’ll only say it once (feel free to read it over and over and over…). Getting married (in and of itself) is NOT an achievement or accomplishment. It is not a degree. It is not a certificate, neither is it an accreditation nor an award. You did not “earn” it by merit or by the skill-full pursuit of studying marriage or married people. Therefore do not treat it as such. Single ladies, do not act as if your life will only start after that guy has put a ring on your finger…it will NOT. You are an entire being with an ENTIRE life; please do something with it other than wait for a man to "complete" you. To my darling ladies, who are engaged or married… You are not suddenly the expert on relationships because you managed to ‘bag’ one so do not give unsolicited tips on how to “marry” or “keep a man” or “make it work” unless you are explicitly asked to do so. We (your single friends) are eternally happy that you have found your own version of wedded bliss and we wish you nothing but the best. Be happy and celebrate yourself and your boo…but abeg, biko…do not throw it in our faces like suddenly your shit don’t stink cause this dude can stand the smell of it. I am writing this not so much for my obnoxious married compadres (I have none oh…all ma married gf’s are awesome…I love una well well. Lol.) but more as a means to address the growing discomfort us single ladies face in an afro-centric world view and culture. I think at this point in the evolution of the world, we can and should be able to think for ourselves and make our own decisions. Therefore, it is absolutely ridiculous that society still dictates and expects that by a certain age, a young girl (regardless of her own merits) is expected suddenly to base all her worth on her ability to get a man to put a ring on her finger. I have been told point blank…by people I love and respect…that no matter what a woman accomplishes on her own, without a husband…she is nothing. I cannot reconcile myself with this point of view. Why is marriage such a big freaking deal?! Does it add anything to my worth to be called MRS-somebody? In the old days, marriage was a way to ensure financial security for a woman or between families…but if I can provide for myself, does this still hold? Marriage was a way to ensure that people have children (seeing as getting pregnant out of wedlock was a big NO-NO!)…but in this day and age, do I need a man attached to my hip to have a child (my clock may tick…but there are now scientific ways to slow/freeze said ‘clock’ until I am ready)? So if the answers to these questions are NO, then really…why is it incessantly drummed into our heads that we should endeavour to “settle down” ASAP? Even guys get an ear-full these days! Does anyone gain a special honor or recognition or merit or ANYTHING other than a partner to share their life with through marriage?! And is that worth all the bru-ha-ha ?

I was going to make the argument that finding the “right one” for you is THE major accomplishment because no lie, it is hard out there. As in, of all the gals and guys in the world…you found “THE ONE” and now u’ll be happy forever. Right? Right…? Maybe; However, how many of us actually believe in ‘the one’ and even if you did, do we actually do anything to find that person or do they just happen to stumble upon us by chance (after enough fasting and prayer of course…chance…lol)?! So, I cannot even argue this angle.

Now, that being said…I can understand how the wedding is a big deal…it is a public acknowledgement of your decision to commit to each other as man and wife. Wonderful! Fantastic...Sometimes, its even beautiful. However, by virtue of you signing that marriage license…have you really achieved anything?! I think NOT! Marriage is a journey…just like happiness and life…it is not an end point but rather, a dynamic push and pull between two people. It should be treated and revered as such. Do not expect a cookie from me simply because you tied the knot...it is the way you spend the rest of your life that counts! Even if we were to quantify the accomplishment of marriage…say at the end of 30 years…what will be the key end points? That the couple stayed together for 30years? That they were happy while together for 30years? That they had children? That their children did not turn out to be raging sociopaths or killers? What would be the measure of success in a marriage? I cannot say. It would depend on the goals set by the individuals at the onset. For me, it would be that I am happy and sane and still loving my husband after so many years. That I added as much goodness to his life as he did mine; that I can look back without regret or remorse…with a twinkle of laughter in my eye at the journey we’ve shared. That would be my success (if to say we hammer while we are together….e no go bad oh!). But hey, that’s just me.So single people, stop holding your breath and just live your live...married guys and gals...keep it moving! there's still an entire life to be led! Live it well.

If I die now I go happy say
Say when I dey this world I don fall in love…

Disclaimer: I am NOT anti-marriage!

Here we go again..

2009-09-17T17:56:00.004+01:00

I woke up on the wrong(est)[...is there a word like that? never mind! lol..] side of the bed this morning... It was as if i was a zombie. I was so angry for no reason. When ever I am this way, I have so much energy, so usually I direct it to useful endeavors.
So, I cleaned the house, mopped,scrubbed,waxed the floors accompanied by the banging, thumping beats from Jay Z's Blue print 3... Sorted out the dirty clothes... the laundry guy came to pack the shirts, and I washed the jeans and the other trousers...

As at 10 am...I was amazed at the amount of work I did under 4 hours.. as I dressed up for work, I though about the funny discourse I had with my mum when I traveled home....
4.26am...I was still sleeping...and a single tap woke me up...
"mama..why are up early" I asked ...I knew why she was in room ..
"I want to talk to you" she answered soberly
She went down the all too familiar road of trying to find out what was happening in my life, romantically...
Mama had a tough time giving birth to me..five days of labour before I finally dropped on the 16th of december..so I guess I'm special lol.
I told her I was still searching and she proffered a solution, many a young man had dreaded: "do you want me to look for someone for you?"
From where? Village? Lol
Hell no, Ma! I almost screamed.
Biko, e never reach like that.
I will find, when the time is due..

X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x X

Please, let me ask the ladies..why do u stay with someone who obviously doesn't love you? I read tigeress' post that somewhat, mirrored my frustration. I am asking this question because I couldn't sleep last nite. My neighbour upstairs dealt with his wife real bad. This is not the first time. There was a time, shortly before christmas last year, the man descended on the woman and left her with a serious black eye that kept her company through out the yuletide.
I asked her one time why she still stayed on and she said she loved him and that he loves her. He loved her and he beat on her arse every damn day? I really can't reconcile that. Way backin school, boys use to show some form of superiority. By using belts on their girlfriends.. And the girls stayed on..after all, are bad boys not better lovers, they opinioned?
Even though I was in the minority, I still maintained that any man that beats on his girl does so out of inferiority complex.
I can't beat or harass you to get respect..respect and fear are not the same. Respect is given with freedom of heart, not forced.. Fear is not.
By the time I see my neighbor tomorrow, I am sure she is going to be injured in one way or another and she will tell me one more story about love

X x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x X

Growing up, I have been the one writing poems to girls that I liked or I was interested in..no one has ever written one for/ to me but 2 days ago, I got this one in d mail. I have read it more than 10 times and I am putting it up here cos it is special to me..

I'm out people!

i find myself willingly wandering into the arms of someone so far away.
whose touch i haven't felt.
whose eyes i haven't seen.
whose lips i dream of kissing but stop myself short of blushing...
imagining his hands around my waist,
holding me too close such that i feel his breath on my neck...my face.
i find myself doing what i said i wouldn't' do.
Yet somehow,
this time
...i don't mind.
i'm enjoying feeling this familiar feeling of excitement and impatience.
wanting everything and anything to happen all at once...
yet not being ready...
not being sure..
of whether i want more...
because the silence that is the vast distance between us descends down on me.
and carries me back to my reality...miles away from his.
until i find myself wondering again...
what he's doing..
if he's eaten..
if he'll call...

untitled

2009-09-08T11:01:00.003+01:00

My last post was on July 21st.

It was not my intent to do a "willie willie" on blogsville. It was just that all of sudden, I became so busy. Also I finally went on leave and I traveled to see my folks. I have not seen them for 2 years + a few months...but we speak at least for 30 minutes everyday. My mum was so expectant..asking me what soup I wanted and all that..if I wanted nkwobi, or ugba... , cos I am so close to my mum so I was so excited to see her. I was caught up in the whole travel thing until she asked me if I was coming back with "her".

HER??

who? I feigned massive concentrated ignorance..
Mother pressed on...it was only after she realized that I was not ready to budge, that she let me be.

I shopped at shop rite 2 days before I was due to leave. I wanted to get some things for my family. I spent almost the entire day at the mall, meandering from aisle to aisle looking for stuff. I noticed this lady. Well dressed in small khaki shorts, with never ending legs. Damn! I kept stealing glances at her legs. I was wondering, what type of temptation this was and I also thought about how good it will feel to take her home to my mum...
"Hello mum, there SHE is" I would say to her..
I was snapped out of my day dreaming when some kids who had "colonized" and turned their mum' s shopping cart into a race car, screeched to a halt in front of me and the one who was the driver, opened his mouth and blared his horn.
"You are blocking the road!" he yelled
Ahn ahn, bros which ones nah? I wondered. I pushed off and went to the next aisle to get detergents. While I was there, the lady with the legs showed up again. I tried hard not to stare so I looked away....again.
That moment, a quick movement caught my eye. She was stuffing something into her bra.
No way!! She did it again.
I saw what looked nail varnish and a couple of tubes; inside her bra? . Was she shoplifting? In shop rite? What could you possibly shop lif?
Ewooo! So much for taking home to Momma.. She go just wake up in the middle of the night and rob us silly!
Anyway, I just went about my business "jejely".
When I was checking out, I saw her leaving the shop. So she made it out, I wondered.
It is actually not every one you see that is so normal.
On my way back from work yesterday, my colleague was driving and I was in front, beside him. We were having a good time "scoping" ladies in the cars alongside us in the traffic..smile at them, and they'll smile back and say hi.. I saw this pretty girl on a bike. Cute girl to say the least..dressed in a LBD, with her laptop bag on one shoulder and her tote bag on the another.
I caught her eye and held it for some seconds as her bike zoomed past.
"Oh well..lost her" I muttered to myself.
At some point, the road cleared and we moved off. Just before 1004, I saw some activity ahead...the LBD lady was fighting some conductor..
Ahn ahn?
She used her fist to break the glass window by the conductor's side. She slapped the guy, threw her shoe at him and kept on screaming! Next thing, she threw her phone away, tore her dress from the neck down to the waist like the incredible hulk and left her "goodies" exposed! The bus moved off, she ran back to where her bike was waiting for her, opened her bag, took something and ran off leaving the laptop and hand bags with the bike man!
She caught up with the bus, climbed in and sat on the steering with all her "goodies" in the driver's face; as in his face! People were bewildered and were moping at her. She was just screaming at the top of her voice but I could not hear cos my window was wound up. As we drove off, I wondered aloud, what the driver could have done to her within the time she passed us and the time we caught up with them. Whatever it was, I think the lady went too far to go almost naked on ozumba mbadiwe.
Imagine if she was your girl and one day, she pulls this "Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde" stunt...
We have to really open our eyes..there is too much "skoin skoin" patrolling about!

Anyways, from shop rite that I drove straight to ABC to cargo the things for my folks to Owerri. I had already reserved my Aero ticket online for 5k. 5k...that promo was so scary. One day, they will start picking and dropping passengers mid air.
It is all good tho'.

Anyways, the night before I left, I got a call to ask if I was willing to move a brand new mercedes benz GL550 to Owerri?
For the right price, why not?
So I "shenked" the flight and drove down to owerri. The drive was very good even tho the roads were terrible. I stopped every 100 meters cos the police wanted to do "stop and search". The sweetest stretch of road was from a place called Umunede in delta state to Onitsha. I made owerri at about 3.40pm. My mum was so glad to see me. 2 years was such a long time.
I will give more gist but this is just to let peeps know that I am back.
Shout out to my peeps who were "worried" when I was away:
Tigeress..haha.. The love is bluetooth!
Juiceegal..helloo beautiful! That nose ring is so cute!
M of the cerberus..what's up hommie?
Danny.. Thanks. I am still searching. Lol
Tisha..waited for that call. I am sure it is coming on the turtle express. Lol
BSNC..hmmm, where do I start from? Thank u so much for everything!
Solomon Sydelle..thanks for that comment, I have updated oooooo!
And to every other blogger who I forgot to mention, thanks for holding it down. I came back to blogsville and it was as if the place wan burst! See updates every 30mins. I am challenged and motivated. Thanks fam!

I am back!

2009-07-21T10:07:00.006+01:00

Kai!! It has been so long.
I am sorry..it has been a long minute. Situations no gree me. Work has been something else, but I am beginning to enjoy it because opportunities are beginning to open up. Managerial positions were thrown up some weeks and we applied. Last week international opportunities were available and we applied too..lol..by fire or by force..we must get there.

I wish I have the strength to update every other day like leggy does..... That lady will not kill me..Leggy ..you hear me? You no go kill me.!! Ahn ahn ?? I can't even keep up with just reading her blog.. She updates as if somebody dey chase am..lol..abeg leggy come help me update my own jooo! lol

I could not attend Cerberus' Chill and relax.....I was looking forward to the event..I heard a few gidi bloggers were up for it...I was looking forward to 'chucking' myself into one corner and trying to figure out who was who...Sirius, Funms, Doug, Juiceegal etc..lol
Before you knew it, I was scheduled for training. TRAINING???? ON A SUNDAY????

I was so vexed eh...kai! which kain winsh be this one?
All through that training..my face was like a mask..hahahahaha.....at some point, the facilitator, a funny indian with a beard as long as santa's, asked me in that funny accent of theirs "what was wrong with me", I was tempted to answer "nehi, nehi"...lol

As if the the stress at work was not enough, one of my bosses decided to pick on me. The guy no know say na one chance im enter.

I remember when I started work, I followed one funny rule that I got oof one self help book like that, and wore my old clothes to work the first week. Funny enough, it worked...I was totally ignored by the so called 'big boys' at work who didn't see me as a threat and the normal people at work didn't see me as a threat either..after all, I dressed like them..so I was one of them..
Third week, I came in to work in all my 'splendour'..lol sharp, dapper..lol but by then, i don already choose my people for work: both big and small.
But there was this superior of mine that just didn't like me. I noticed this because I am that sensitive. The way he looked at me sometimes, especially when he felt that I was not looking. Eyes filled with spite and hate...and I used to wonder..unto which levels.. I mean he is my superior?
I am not one for assumptions, but I figured if us being men, he will approach me if he had any issues with me. If he didn't approach me then, there was no issue.
Before I knew it, stuff started floating around the office..how he said that I was arrogant and cocky too, and that I had a mighty, big chip on my shoulder. That I dressed too good and all sorts. At first I didn't mind....but at some point, it began to get to me because where he discussed me, I have no access to so it was becoming increasingly difficult to contain the damage being done to my person and my superiors were beginning to have skewed perceptions about me. If they go for managers' meeting, the said superior will tell the director that I was unruly and that I was inciting other staff against the management. There was a situtation at work, one certain day and I merely stood up for myself and protected my right and because of that singular act, I was now termed a rebel. I noticed that the situation was getting out of hand.
A few people in the know advised me to avoid him at all costs because he had sworn that he was going to mess me up..ah!

After work, we were allowed to facebook and generally use the internet....so one day, after work, I was on FB, the said superior saw me and before I knew it, I had a memo for 'watching the internet', while at work and he copied my line manager, the senior manager and director of customer care/commercial and the director of HR....see me see issues.

I replied the memo, copying everyone that he copied and cited the time I logged off. I also quoted excerpts of the hand book where it stated that we were allowed to use the computers, internet for personal use. I let it slip that he allowed members of his team to use the internet, so I wondered why my case was different and why he was judging selectively. That memo damaged his credibility and he hopped off my d*#K! I hate it when people in positions of authority and power throw their weight around, because they have the power..pisses me off.

I read Cerberus' post where he was looking for his mojo...I was laughing but i was glad. I wasn't being spiteful oo..lol..I was just glad that it wasn't happening to me alone. I have lost the zeal for the chase. I used to enjoy the chase. when the lady gave you the initial brush off, then you 'racked' your brains for new and ingenious means of getting her attention. the thrill that the chase brought. the looks that you gave a subject of your attention even from across a crowded room...willing her to catch your eye and hold your gaze...and when she did, the mental battle of who tear away first, was spine tingling. I was so good at the 'gaze holding', because I had the ability of zoning out while my eyes were planted firmly on your eyes.

But in recent times, if I even try to chat the lady up and get the brush off/ rejection, I don't bother going back. Sometimes, the lady calls me up..wondring ...why I gave up so quick.....

I don't know what is happening and why..I think I am just tired..I also think this whole male , female, relationship thing is kinda over rated. i am striking out on my own...lol i am going to enjoy this single life as much as I can.
I am taking a rain check!

As Funms USED to say ( cos I don't know if she still saying it...lol sorry funms for taking a swipe at ya! lol)...This heart is closed until further notice!

A quick one!

2009-07-10T07:16:00.003+01:00

Sup..people..long time..abi? I have been terribly busy..lots of things of to do..work has been demanding...and a lot of has happened..I will gist you guys later. I just saw this...I don't know if it is true...if it is a limited edition or if it is the work of a good craftsman...Nice I must say tho'
Catch you later!!

Death and his kinsmen...

2009-06-24T06:16:00.005+01:00

It is so sad that the thin between life and death is so blurry that I am finding it hard to differentiate. Someone is here today, tomorrow, the person is gone. This is not even about MJ...he was looking tired towards the last days. It was not like I knew his time was up or something...I just wasn't so shocked when I heard he was gone. This is not about Farah Fawcett...she had cancer...so I knew that her time was short..This is about scores of people who were here at the beginning of the year and now, no longer here...

I was watching criminal minds, Season 4..( that is the only tv show that keeps me glued on..asides prison break, Csi Miami, Las Vegas, lol)..On a whim, around 11.55pm, I paused the movie to check CNN to see if I can catch up with their sports update ( cos i want to see how they will analyze the South African vs Brazil match...cos South Africa almost embarrassed the samba boys), next thing I knew, a news flash came up that MJ was in coma, before you know it, he was dead..I am not going to bore you with details...everyone knows what's up...the thing was that it caused me to think deeply early this morning. I could not sleep. I kept tossing and turning.
I remembered the sweet senior manager at my work place who died after a fibroid operation...
My uncle, who had a crazy attack of stroke and was gone in a jiffy... My beautiful cousin Lisa, who lived in ATL, dived into a swimming pool and hit her head on the tiles...and poof! that was it. As her blood seeped away, her life went with it.
My other cousin, gentle and meek, on her way back home from school...died in a car crash. Eye witnesses said that the driver did a crazy over taking and saw an on coming vehicle..in order to avoid a head on collision, he tried to save himself by turning the right side of the vehicle to face the oncoming vehicle. The on coming vehicle ...a mini lorry rammed directly into the front passenger seat and my dear cousin died. Every other person survived. The driver escaped unharmed.
There are a lot...friends, relations of friends..some deaths were expected, others were not..but in all, people lost loved ones that they will never see again.
For my cousin that died in a car crash, she kept complaining that I never called her..I kept promising and re promising ( is there a word like that?), cos I felt I was so busy with work; and finally I didn't fulfill that promise. I wonder what kind of thoughts she had for me before she went away...like ..this my cousin is insensitive and uncaring.
I learnt that I should under promise and over deliver...
I also learnt that I should more attention to the people around me..you don't know if the last time you saw them will be the last time you will ever see them...

I was going to see someone off at the airport...I had booked the person in, at a hotel close to the Old domestic airport..Skyline hotel..so the person's flight was for 10 am to Heathrow. I left my apartment like 6.10am and I was moving steadily oooo..I think I was doing like 80.. just before Obanikoro, .from nowhere, this Mercedes truck jumps into my lane....If you know Ikorodu road very well...you know that means the lorry jumped the road divider/ dual carriage divider and came into my lane..I had taken my eyes off the road for a nano second, next thing I knew, it was in front of me. I swerved to the left...Because I had a heavy car...a Camry 09, the steering jumped out of my hands. I watched in fear as the lorry driver wrestled with his steering and missed me by a hair's breathe. As he passed me, I tried to control the car..but not until it hit the curb and the front right tyre went flat with a loud bang. I guess that helped bring the car to a stop. I was shaken. I looked back. The lorry had ran into a bus stop shade. The people there made away before it got to them.
I jejely changed my tyre, and a few people came over to express their concern... By the time I got to the hotel, the person had taken a cab to the international wing of the airport...
Looking back...it struck me with a heavy chord of fear that if not for God, a different story would have been told..

On the same note, I saw this somewhere and it summarizes what we see in Lagos everyday...

25 RULES OF ENGAGEMENT, Lagos Driving 101

1. When in doubt, accelerate!
2. Be prepared to ram anything stoping you wearing uniform in Lagos (police, traffic warden,FRSC, Kai brigade, fire brigade, VIO, lastma, lamata, laswa, even lawma sef)
3. If you get caught by any chance, DO NOT allow them to enter your car, if they happen to get in DO NOT drive from that spot (vere off traffic & settle 5hun), and if they don’t agree, form calling your uncle who is in the army (believe me it always works), never follow them to ANY sort of office except you wanna pay X10
4. Never give police or VIO your original particulars (whether expired or up to date)
5. Danfo drivers believe they are immortal. NEVER yield to the temptation to teach them otherwise.
6. Okada riders have a pact with suicide, avoid them like a plaque
7. Avoid BRT buses in all ramifications, they have NO brakes
8. Taxi cabs (oko asewo) should always have the right of way, all of them have been driving in Lagos for 25yrs.
9. Never, ever, stop for a pedestrian unless he flings himself under the wheels of your car.
10. The first parking space you see will be the last parking space you see. Grab it. Survival of the fittest you may say!
11. Learn to swerve abruptly. In Lagos, potholes (and sometimes car-holes) are put in key locations to test drivers’ reflexes and shock absorbers,( I saw one man fishing in one of the potholes last week).
12. There is no such thing as “one-way”in Lagos. Expect traffic from any direction at all times. The okada riders are the experts in this area.
13. Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive bodywork, except you want to spend ur whole saturday @ the panel beater’s place.
14. Morning rush-hours are equivalent to Lagos grand prix (who gets to the junction first)
15. There is no such thing as a short-cut during rush-hour traffic in Lagos. Everybody might be inclined to take that ’short-cut’.
16. When asking for directions, always ask at least 3 people. Lagosians ALWAYS claim to know every inch of the city – even areas they’ve never been to.
17. Use extreme caution when pulling into service lanes. Service lanes are not for breaking down the traffic, but for speeding, especially during rush hour.
18. Never use directional signals, since they only confound and distract other Lagos drivers, who are not used to them.
19. Similarly, never attempt to give hand signals. Lagos drivers, unused to such courtesies, will think you are making obscene gestures to them. This could be very bad for you in Lagos.
20. Hazard lights (popularly called “double pointer”) is not, (as commonly supposed) used to indicate a hazard. It is a warning to you that he is a bona fide Lagos driver, he’s headed ’straight’ and as such, will not stop under any circumstance. Take him extremely seriously especially if he backs it up with a continuous blast from his “horn”.
21. At any given time, do not stand on the zebra crossing expecting traffic to yield to you, or else you will have to explain to the on coming traffic whether you look like a zebra.
22. Speed limits are arbitrary figures posted only to make you feel guilty.
23. Remember that the goal of every driver is to get there first by whatever means necessary.
24. In Las Gidi every spot is a potential bus stop. FRSC and LASTMA know that too. It is in their constitution.
25. Above all, keep moving. Even with a flat tire!!!
HORNING IN LAGOS
- ‘Horn’ when someone executes a dangerous manoeuvre.
- ‘Horn’ when you’re about to move off.
- ‘Horn’ when you’re about to overtake.
- ‘Horn’ when someone is about to overtake you.
- ‘Horn’ when turning into a road.
- ‘Horn’ when emerging from a road.
- ‘Horn’ back when someone horns at you. It’s considered good etiquette.
- ‘Horn’ when you hear a chorus of horns. Don’t worry if you don’t know what all the ‘horning’ is about.
- ‘Horn’ when you’re happy.
- ‘Horn’ to the beat when you’re playing music in your car.
Good luck, as you expeditiously navigate through Lagos and hustle and bustle!

Father's day post!

2009-06-21T12:21:00.002+01:00

Forgive me for any errors, typos..it was done in some bit of hurry.

"Happy father's day.
I love you dad...
You are the greatest".

I read the text over and over again. Until I felt the tears sting my eyes. Before I could control it, a few dropped on my desk.
I quickly wiped them away while I turned to see if my colleague witnessed the little spectacle. He was looking at me but I refused to meet his eye.
I wonder why I had to read the text over again, when I was the one who sent the text to my dad earlier this morning.
I guess it was because we have a lot of history.
I remember when I was a teenager...full of rebellion. I did the exact opposite of what expected of me. I used to pilfer my father's money....and give to the boys on my street...a'la Robin Hood..the only difference was that my dad was not like the evil count that Robin hood stole from. My pa was and is a good man, who in a bid to turn me from my rascally ways, used the cane on me more often than i wanted..lol
So I pilfered his money and gave to the boys on my street in order to hurt him. I was headstrong. I taught the boys on the street how to jump from a one storey building, how to climb my neighbor's mango tree and pluck unripe mangoes and hide them in tins, thus forcing them to ripen. My mum used to shout and drag me by the ear like a pig to slaughter...."ihe anunwa ga asa gi afo!!" This thing will spoil your tummy...
For where???
I no dey hear. I will steal out and eat the mangoes with my boys..
I remember one christmas...I think I was 12, we went home to my village for christmas... usually, my transformation from a city boy to a village rat was under minutes. As soon as I jumped out of the car, I was already run around the dusty compound with my cousin in tow.
In a few minutes, we were up to no good. One "wicked" woman, lol who lived at one corner of the compound. She was never nice, never bought akara when she was from the market; never gave us cool water from her earthenware pot. She never had a smile for us. We crept into her and lit a couple of bangers, all nine of us. Trust me, greedy boy, I scratched four at the same time, and we dropped them into an empty earthenware pot and we scrammed.. the quiet evening exploded with a series of bangs that were enhanced by the enclosed space of the pot.
the woman rained curses on us and that brought my Dad out. by then we were already gone.
Five hours later, around 8.30pm, nine of us crept away from the gathering where my granny was regaling us with moonlight tales, and snuck towards the "wicked" mama's house. Again, we repeated the earlier operation, instead this time, we had a handful. I didn't know my dad saw us when we moved, so he was waiting for us as we ran out. When we saw him, glee turned to panic...
boys scattered, and the man came after: the obvious ring leader.
I took off.
He came after me.
I ran to the back of the house, towards the garage..I saw a bench, i jumped over it. He didn't see the bench, and he went over. I didn't stop.

By the next morning, The consequences of my actions dawned on me.
My dad was in pains with bruises on a side of his face and his legs in some form of a cast.
His christmas was over.
My guilt was for a moment. By the time I heard the sound of a banger, I was gone like a candle in the wind.
Growing up, my relationship with my father detoriated. By the time I was 18, I stole the car out of the house and drove to UNN with my friends.
He found out the hard way that flogging was not working again. Taking twenty strokes of the cane was now a test of strenght and I was already used to it.

By the time i was hitting 20, I survived a car crash, and my whole perspective towards life changed. I saw that in a bit to protect me and make me a better person, my dad had endured a whole lot from me.
From then on, the dynamics of our relationship changed. I began to see him as my best friend and confidante, he began to see me as his ally and consiglere..lol We did a lot of things together and eight years down, I have not regreted that singular decision to be a better person.

I want to do a lot for him...asides the general thing i want to do for my family.
He said he wants a Poultry after retirement..I am almost there with that. He told me that he wants a truck, I hope I am able to get that for him.

For all of us, whose fathers have gone to be with the lord, or were not around when you are growing up, the father of fathers will be sure to be there for you.

I know my Pa cannot find this page; He is hardly internet savvy..but i have this overwhelming urge/ need to tell you that I respect you and my loyalty to you is immeasurable. You are my brother, my friend, my confidante, my ally, my father. You arethe greatest. I love you till death.

On another note, I survived a car crash on Wednesday. It was a near miss cos I dodged the truck. will gist you later.

Random thoughts + ramblings...........

2009-06-14T13:13:00.004+01:00

I am having a hard time updating...
True....
E remain small make I go meet the babalawo wey dey my street, make i see if they don come from my villa..lol
But seriously eh...
But I don't want to sound like the legends on blogsville.. I never reach to talk say I don tire...I just started last year..but mehn! Nothing is actually happening that is worth talking about...Tigeress, DB, you know nah!
I have pored over my draft..seeking for saved materials...nothing.
I have tried to get inspiration....in the most unlikely of places...the loo..yet nothing...

I heard from a certain sage that it goes and comes and it is a constant K in the lives of writers. since it has happened to the best of us..I am honored to be a member of that club.

Enough said...

Work has been grueling..Jesus!! ( forgive me lord, I have used your name in vain).. We have this ongoing Promo and it has only helped to confirm that average Nigerian loves awoof!

I mean awoof in every sense of it. Just think of it...free food, free drinks, free transport, free sex (sorry, i had to put that..lol)..free anything.. bonanzas/ promos...
The annoying part is that they will first criticize the free thing, then they will go from the back and enjoy the thing...

''Goodafternoon my name is Princewill"
" Good afternoon my name is Dante, how may I help you"
The customer goes ahead to berate you for having stayed on the queue for one hour...You know this not true..but you overlook that because you are supposed to manage his expectations and give him a 'wow' experience despite you are itching to whip his lil bitch ass...
he tells you that he has heard about the ongoing promo and he goes ahead to give you 10 reasons why he thinks we are thieves and that the promo is a hoax. I wonder why he is still calling the customer care...then he putters about other miscellaneous issues, then he asks me if people are winning the promo...when I tell him yes, he tells me point blank that he does not believe me..what else will you tell him...are you not working there?

By then, you are getting irritated..the call is far gone..9 minutes of talking rubbish with this bloody man! Average handling time is defintely out of the window...
At this point, you are like" I have heard it all..."
"Bros..you be ibo abi?"
"yes, I am."
"Na im you just dey blow grammar dey go..eh nwanna?"
I don't say anything..If I open my mouth, I am sure expletives will burst out..I am trying hard to contain it....
"Bros, abeg tell me wetin I go do make I win"
ahn ahn...I thought he didn't want..
"just fast, pray and hope"
The idiot dropped the call..

Several times, people i know have expressed cynism at a particular thing, then you find out that they are eating out of it/ benefitting from it...very hypocritical, I must say..
Even when people are having parties, uninvited people gatecrash..and then endure the painful humiliation of being tossed out on their asses by some mean ass bouncers..lol

Anyways...I wanted to hang out at Swe bar last night..it was their third anniversary...I knew I was working this morning..so I decided to crash a bit when I got home around 4pm on saturday afternoon so that I will wake up around 7pm and step off...when i opened my eyes, it was 2.35am and i was still sleeping on the couch..lol..yes I know..so annoying..lol

I saw this somewhere..it had me in stitches..I just burst into laughter and the whole office was wondering what was wrong with me..i hope you enjoy it..
I hope to come back stronger, and better....

The EU Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan proposed by Germany that would give what would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the language is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords containing "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

The case of the unseen remote control.

2009-06-01T06:28:00.004+01:00

I boarded the cab @ Ademola Adetokunbo at 11.45am.........I remember passing the national stadium Surulere...I remember because there was a guy on crutches who nearly got ran over by a car while he was trying to pick up the 20 naira note dropped by the driver of a black range rover vogue in fron t of us...I remember wondering...how the disabled guy almost died because of 20 naira...and also how come the range rover guy could spare only 20 naira..and I also had this weird thought that if the disabled guy had been killed, and he got to heaven...at the pearl gates, St Peter, or whoever it was that manning the gates, ( for those of you that have gone to heaven and back, please help me with the correct uncle who stands at the gate..lol) will ask him what killed him, and he will say 20 naira?

Haba..na wah!

That was the last thing I remembered...

I woke up. It was dark. I was very light headed. My phones were on the rug beside the couch I woke up on...I was also dehydrated and it took me at least 2 minutes to realize that was in my apartment. hmmm...

I don't know if you have ever had this feeling of confusion: Maybe you went to bed, when it was daylight and you slept for a long time, and you woke up when it was dark..and at that point, you can't immediately tell whether it was morning or night... or whether it was another day.

Anyways..I checked my phone..it was 7.27pm...I stepped outside.....
My bunch of keys were still stuck on the keyhole outside...
ahh....very strange. i was always careful with that.
I strolled to the gate, came back and put the generator on.

At this point, nothing was out of place..my watch and wallet were still on me, my phones too..
So when my friend came back from work, I went to bed again...after tossing and turning, I drifted off to sleep.

I woke up the next morning, refreshed and normal.
I noticed the message icon on my phone..one from my fiend whom I promised to call the previous day and I didn't.

The second from the first bank...

Your acct xxxxxxxxxx has been debited with
N400,000 on xxxxx- 1:12pm at A.Ogunsanya brnch.
Bal=N410.57CR

What?!!!!!

Sweat trickled down my back...how manage?

I pulled on some clothes and raced down to the branch at Adeniran Ogunsanya..I met with the Manager and she calmed me down while she called the head teller. the guy shows up, remembers me and even tells me what I was wearing the day before.
Usually, when the money you want to withdraw exceeds 100k, first bank will scan your cheque to the branch where your account is domiciled and they will confirm your signature before the payment is made.
The head teller said that I was even patient while the scanning was being done.
He then brought a photocopy of the cheque and I saw my signatures; once in front, twice at the back with my home address too.
So where was the taxi man?
Was he inside the bank with me or was he waiting outside?
When I gave him the 400k, did he leave me in front of the bank and drive off or did he finally drop me at home?
Did he make me do any other thing against my will?
How many were they actually?
One person or more than one?

I was traumatised...no, not traumatised..that is too dramatic..I am not a white boy..lol...I was just ....angry..that someone made me do things that I am not able to remember and that is not nice at all...
What if he gave me a gun and "commanded me to go rob a bank or something?

It was then I remembered that I left a bagful of cologne and perfumes worth roughly 162k in the taxi and he made away with it.

In retrospect...I made a couple of mistakes that I shouldn't have made...

1. I got too relaxed..I let my guard down and you never do that in a city like lagos...cos something will creep up and bite you in the ass..

2. I didn't take the proper and necessary precautions...It is an unspoken code that you never take taxis on the street. it pays to go to the taxi park.. If you are not able to do so, make sure the taxi you are entering has the park and association stickers clearly placed on the windscreen so that you will know which park he belongs to.. You may see Victoria Island, Eti Osa local government area etc... I didn't check whether the taxi had it or not...

3.At that point in my life..my relationship with God was its lowest ebb.

If I had a choice, as weird as it sounds, .....I would have prefered it that someone stuck me up with a weapon..at least, i will know that it was a stick up..this jazz/zombie/remote control thing is so demeaning eh! lol

And that was how I was someone's personal Zombie for a day.

So people, be careful.

Wedding blues...

2009-05-26T12:44:00.008+01:00

I have been absent for sometime from my blog.

So much to do...so little time.

A lot is going on in my life...at this moment....I hope I will be able to write about them in due time...

My best friend wedded on Saturday the 23rd of May. He is Ibo and he is married to a Yoruba lady...a beautiful lady.
I was his best man.

The previous day, Friday the 22nd, we went to the bride's place and did the whole traditional/engagement thing... It was fun..cos I was exposed to the Yoruba culture... the whole 'taxing' thing...Mehn..my people from the east were shocked..lol...at each point, bowls were presented and we kept dropping doe..at some point, the compere who was also acting as a spokesman for the bride's family said he didn't want bread paper..referring to 10 and 20 naira bills..that he wanted Nigerian dollars, referring to 100, 200, 500 and 1000 naira bills...
"yeah right!", I muttered under my breathe...clean your face well well, take a deep breathe and take a dive!

Anyways...we had a lot to eat and I appreciate the fact that the bride's family contracted an Ibo woman to make Oha soup for us..it was a very pleasant surprise...and we felt appreciated that they took the pains to do..very good PR...lol

The wedding day proper....I had to leave early to the church...St Agnes, Maryland to ensure that everything was ready and on point..as per best man wey i be...lol... Made the place in 7 minutes from Surulere...why not...I was driving someone's brand new Audi TT 2008, S tronic, dual clutch automatic, S-spec interior with Alcantara and leather sport seats, and upgraded brakes to handle the extra power,19-inch wheels, 0 to 60 in 5.2 seconds...sigh....kai!!..anyway..this one na story for another day..
After checking and confirming that everything was in place, I streaked back to the hotel where I was staying with the groom..cos my house had been taken over by my friends who came into Lagos for the wedding...
The rest happened in a blur...
I remember the presiding priest talk about the roles of the man and the woman in marriages and how they turn to fathers and mothers..not because they have children but because they begin to exhibit the characters and traits usually shown by fathers and mothers..

I noticed two things tho'....
Some people actually come to weddings to get hitched....

Every lady I saw appeared eligible...suitable?..well...I wouldn't know.
I was looking dapper..no doubt! ( Yes nah. I know when I am..lol) i was getting all them coy smiles and looks.
Really! There was this one guy I saw chatting with different ladies. The guy had his A game on. After being rebuffed by a couple of them...he finally got one who he spent the next 2 hours whispering into her ears....It was obvious that it was on for them!

Secondly, people still come to weddings and ceremonies in general to steal/nab/tap. I thought that was so yesterday..cos a whole lot of them have been caught and dealt with mercilessly. You would think that the rest of them will learn from those ugly experiences...for where?
This dude came in..or rather, I saw him first when the couple were dancing...I actually don't like it when money is sprayed during occasions. Aside the fact, that it looks as if the national currency is being treated with some bit of disrespect, it is also as if you are attracting the 'mumu' people who come to try to pick the sprayed doe...
Anyways..I was "overseeing" the spraying of money while the couple was dancing. I had to make sure that nobody was up to some "mumu" stunts
Then this dude shows up, clutching a can of Guinness stout. I watched him and for close to 3 minutes, he was nodding his head and tapping his feet to the beat..
"who be this one nah"..I wondered..
Then one "big man" showed and my attention was on him for a moment...
The man reached into his agbada, brought a bundle of mint 5 hundies, and he started spraying.
A sudden movement caught my eye...dude with can drink was now doing a vigorous dance step ..abi na routine that was a mix of tai chi, kung fu, atilogwu and alanta...ahn ahn?
Then the "big man", tore the wrappers off two bundles of 5 hundies..and threw the whole thing into the air...

I saw money actually rain.

I also saw "dude" plucking money off in the air as if he owned the heavens that was bringing forth the rain of money.
I grabbed him, twisted his arm, forcing him to drop the money, then I shoved him off.
If he wasn't well dressed, I would have let him go, with the money, on the assumption that he didn't know what he was doing and that he was led by a natural need to get money and probably buy food for himself..but...
This dude was major!
Well dressed in woodin..
He tried to proffer an explanation.
I stared him down and he shambled off.
Hours later, while talking to my subject of interest and trying to get the lady's phone number, I saw him being beaten black and blue by the church's security.. (whom I saw earlier, wielding some dangerous looking pump action double barreled rifles).
"What did he do", I asked someone
"were ni..no mind am..im dey put hand for person pocket"
The last image I had of him was when one hefty man, kicked him up and he fell on his back on the hard concrete paved and tarred road.

After the wedding...peeps still congregated at my friend's apartment. Almost everyone had a wife, husband in tow. These were peeps that I grew up with..ok....granted, most of them were older and ahead of us in secondary school..but..lol
Anyways, we had fun...I was so lost in the whole thing that I forgot I was working that night..
I finally left at 8.10pm for work which should have started at 8pm. I got there at 9.14pm, due to the snarl of a traffic on Ozumba Mbadiwe, close to shop rite...

I got to work..knackered....
At 2am..i couldn't fight the sleep....I allowed it to take over me...lol..zzzzzzzzzz...lol

* * * * * * *

I have been skeptical of sharing this on blogsville..
partly, because this incident was the exact opposite of what I believed in.
Or maybe I felt err..traumatized?..nah not traumatized..i am not a white boy..lol..maybe a lil' vulnerable cos I felt used and open....
But BSNC advised me to take my time and share it whenever I am comfortable enough to do so...
I guess I am as comfortable as I can ever get..
Early December, 2008, I went to Akin Adesola, to supply some mates of mine some bottles of cologne..then I cabbed to Ademola Adetokunbo...where I dropped some off for someone else.

I hailed a cab and I told the cabbie that I was going to Surulere. we settled for 1k and settled at the back and started reading a paper back that i had with me...I remember passing the National stadium Surulere...
That was the last thing I remembered.

Early to bed, early to rise..

2009-05-19T18:12:00.003+01:00

I woke up late this morning.

7.40am, precisely.

The staff bus left my bus stop at 6.10am.

For close to 10 minutes, I was disoriented. I wonder how that happened...

11.30pm...last night ..That was when I got home. The traffic along Ozumba Mbadiwe was monstrous...for lack of a better word to use..
I got home, tired and hungry. Thank God for Salihu, the suya guy. 700 naira suya, 60 naira agege bread + a glass of cold milk and I was made.

Made a few phone calls, stalked a few blogs, went on FB and finally drifted off to sleep around 1am. I woke up normally at 4.10am.
But I was tired.
I decided to close my eyes a bit..just a bit.
When I opened my eyes..after "the bit", it was 7.40am.

Dayummmmm!!!

I had a training at 8am.

If I had a chopper, Surulere to Lekki would have been easy..

Maybe a honda VFR, ivtec, I would have zig zagged through the mounting traffic...

But not a car. No way.

I rushed into the bathroom and in 5 minutes, I was out of the house. I looked at the traffic and I had to be practical.
An okada was the only option...and I did the okada.
30 teary eyed minutes later, I was at worked..hassled and frazzled..lol but at work.

Gidi..the city where you have to be anything at anytime to survive.

I have been running around since last week. My best friend is wedding on saturday and I am his best man..lol.. I have 6 guys within my age bracket who are wedding between may and december..This thing is knocking on my door lol..
Shebi na person wey see the lady wey im fit marry go marry, abi?

I saw this post below on a friend's page on FB..while I don't agree to some of the issues raised here, it still makes for a feel good funny post. Let me know what you think..

40 reasons to date a naija guy

1. He understands your accent.
2. He knows that when you suffix every sentence with 'now', its not a command, e.g. "Come let's go now..."
3. When you guys go out, he pays and doesn't expect a refund of exactly half!
4. He understands why you have to send money home - probably doing the same himself!
5. He doesn't see your kid sister staying in your house as an inconvenience/ cramping his style.
6. He doesn't think you should put your parents in a home.
7. He eats 'Gbegiri and Amala' and doesn't think it's 'yucky' or 'spicy'. In a nutshell, loves your cooking
8. He gets your jokes.
9. The way he licks his ten fingers 'cos that Ogbono soup hit da spot, Oh Yes!!!
10. He has got his education or he got something going on.
11. He may be a baby daddy but he loves his kids and takes care of them.
12. He can have a bus load of conversation without him saying much 'cos his momma taught him that.
13. He loves to see you shake that ass to Sir Shina Peters, the original "Back That Ass Up" master.
14. He will settle an argument and say sorry while maintaining his man status.
15. I am IN charge but he is THE charge, we understand that.
16. He knows where he is from. Living in NY does not mean you are from NY.
17. He thinks you're so pretty without makeup.
18. He calls you native endearing names like "Nne" or "Omo" or ‘nke m’
19. He has respect [not to be confused with obedience) for his elders(important).
20. The way he gets embarrased and says "I beg oh" when you compliment him.
21. The way he says "I love you baby" ? may be very fake yet sounds so TRUE!
22. The way he eats meat with his bare hands? for some reason it is sexy to me.
23. The way he calls you his wife in front of all his friends.
24. The way he says "Shey you get am" when he thinks you are not paying attention, but you really are.
25. The way he knows that it is you calling and answers the phone "Hey Baby!" without looking at the caller ID.
26. The way Naija men look when they are all decked out in native? there is nothing sexier than a dark chocolate man in lace, native prints or white linen outfit for that matter. I think its really sexy
27. Pronounces your name like say na im born you.matter of fact, the fact that his name is native has its own appeal
28. The way he flows from Ebonics to Pidgin English to Akata with ease.
29. He is just at home at your office picnic as he is at the Naija reunion.
30. The very satisfied look on his face after eating one of your meals and the way he glares at you while picking his teeth with the tooth pick,and you both know that you are his next "meal".
31. He appreciates the art of yanshrolling when he sees one!
32. Keeps you from doing wahala by buying a stickshift vehicle he knows U can't drive!
33. He saves you money on groceries a la "limited diet". Just cook the stew and he'll figure the rest? Eba, Amala, Fufu, garri or even plain old White Bread!
34. No need for breast implants to impress am!
35. No need to go kill himself trying to maintain a six pack. He knows u know big belle is sexy inside Agbada!
36. He knows to allow you like three hours to get ready for a party!
37. He will not complain when you waka with headful of rollers inside house but quick to let you know that aint nothing sexy about that when you want to go outside.
38. Her singing while doing housework is a classic reminder of wetin you dey miss when you dey carry Akata woman!
39. His lunch (Rice, Beans, Dodo, complete with carefully selected assorted meat) wey you pack for am na something u know sey im no go wait chop
40. He thinks the small gap between your front teeth are actually sexy!!!!
Finally, Cool Cos He Is Just A Naija Man Period

I will put a proper post later...make una no vex..

A rush of thoughts to the brain....Long Post alert!!

2009-05-10T09:33:00.008+01:00

First, I want to apologize for the half posts and in a case, a quarter post that I have been putting up here..BSNC even complained...that I was actually turning into a paparazzo ....lol
...work has been crazy..lotta trainings for a new product that we launched..
My life just revolved around work and my house..from work to my house, back to work...just like that...I know I have an almost non existent social life, but then...

On Monday, on my way to work, a lot of thoughts were running through my head and the issue of friendship came up. I had to check up the dictionary definition of a friend, in case I had lost the definition and meaning somewhere along the line.
A friend...a person you know very well and regard with trust and affection.

A person whom one knows so well ad regards with affection and fondness

Aristotle defined it as a single soul living in two bodies..

This means that your friend, despite the different outward appearances, must be close to you when it comes to qualities inside..ie the values you both share must be same or very similar...
so if you have love for the less priviledged and your friend does not, then there is a possibility that it may not work abi?
Or if your friend likes to club and you are homebody or couch potato, it may not work abi?

This basically means that a unique blend of affection, loyalty, love, respect, trust, similar interest is needed to nuture friendship.

Now I also want to believe that as friends come in different and varying sizes and shapes, also they have different purposes..I have had friends that I believe were with me for a reason, for a season and a very few ...very, very few are looking like they are here for the whole ride.

I had a friend who was like a mentor...at some point in my life, he taught me a lot. But I realized now that he used to make feel insecure..in the sense that he criticised any move I made to be independent or live outside of his sphere or circle of influence.. he virtually ran my life for me and everything he said was right and everything I said or did was wrong, unless it was sanctioned by him. By the time I moved to lagos and I met up with him again, I had matured considerably from the 17 year old green horn I was to a 25 year old independent, mature man... I stood up to him and the whole friendship thing fell like pack of cards and I was left wondering if what I experienced then was friendship or if I was a tool for self aggrandizement..( cos he used me to shine, well well lol)

I also had a friend, who liked to borrow from me...( clothes, money, kicks, food, every damn thing imaginable). At first I never had issues because I had a lot of stuff to go round. Growing up I never really had stuff. At some point, especially the toddler stage, I had toys but as an adolescent, I never had. There were situations where my cousins gave me stuff..clothes, kicks and if we had a minor argument, they would come and take the stuff they gave to me. Immediately, I got to the point that I could buy stuff for myself, I went into overdrive and I bought everything "buyable".

So I never really minded, but I realized that my friend only called when he needed a shirt or a pair of jeans etc and I stopped giving him because I also realized that he kept hoarding his own while borrowing mine, using and in most cases, never returning them to me . Secondly, he slept with a girl I was seeing at one time. I was living in Owerri and going to Port Harcourt every weekend for my course at NIIT. This particular weekend, I got to the park late..around 6pm and the only, available bus going to PH was the NDDC mass transit, then popularly known as PortHarcourt by air, because of the speed at which they traveled. I didn't feel like traveling because those NDDC buses have been involved in a couple of very crazy crashes. So I decided to go back home. I let myself into my house with my key and found my friend in bed with the girl..needless to say that clothes and kicks were not the only thing he was borrowing. lol
After I stopped lending him stuff, the friendship died like that.

I have had friends who came in at particular points that I needed them...and helped me emotionally, financially etc, and most of them dropped off the radar after their mission was completed in my life.

I have lost friends, I have gained some.. I have learnt that everyone cannot be your friend..lai lai..that you do not have force friendship...it will come naturally, at its time.....that you cannot buy friendship with money or any other means of exchange..that you just have to be yourself to be friends with someone..that you cannot manipulate friendship..
But in all..I have realized that your friend sticks with you through thick and thin, while maintaining that dynamic mutual relationship through which they negotiate the boundaries within which both parties function.

Thus, it is essential you find friends who are compatible with you on an emotional and psychological basis.

So, the big question is how many of the people who hang around you are your FRIENDS?

Another one bites the dust...

2009-05-07T19:00:00.003+01:00

I am sorry for not putting up a proper post..something happened..I will put up a post about it later...meanwhile, I just saw this...

What an eventful week!!

2009-05-04T14:15:00.006+01:00

I woke up on May 1st, on the right side of the bed.

By 6.15am, I was out of the house.
Caught a BRT to TBS....The Platform was beckoning.

I had fun. The different speakers...John Assaraf, Marshawn Evans, Leke Alder, Dr Boyce Watkins, Fenorris Pearson and Tonye Cole were all on point.

I really enjoyed the papers delivered by Tonye Cole...maybe because he built his business, Sahara Energy, from the scratch...I admire that so much...and also John Assaraf, because he had a dysfunctional childhood and decided to make good at age 19. Marshawn Evans exuded so much confidence while Fenorris Pearson is so accomplished. Dr Boyce..sounded very assertive and errr...controversial..but honest too. Leke Alder is a regular face in conferences in Nigeria..He didn't disappoint. He delivered in his normal, consistent, gustorized manner.

I came home renewed with so much self belief and vigor...In fact my confidence was on steroids. I just felt like I could do anything...anything at all.....

That night, I slept like a log of wood..lol

The next day, 2nd of May, on my way back from work, I stopped at the African Artists foundation, on Raymond Njoku, South West, Ikoyi, for an evening of fun. I was almost star struck...I was staring at the great Odia Ofeimun and when I brought a copy of his book- The poet lied, for him to autograph, my tongue was so heavy I could not even tell him my name..lol

I knew Toni Kan from his days at Hints..and I think he also wrote for True love west africa?...He was still as engaging as ever. ...a very funny man, he also read excerpts from his book- Night of the creaking bed. I also have an autographed copy of that...( I read it all night...very riveting!)...

Joy Isi Bewaji had a tough look..like you do not want to mess with her..lol. Her book..the Eko dialogue, I was not able to get.

Eghosa Imasuen..a medical doctor and the author of To St Patrick, was very engaging.

A Igoni Barrett..who has roots in Jamaica ( his father has lived in Naija for 40 years), while discussing some issues raised in his book- From caves of rotten teeth, admitted that he has never travelled out of naija before, talk less of going to jamaica, the land of his fore fathers. He also admitted that as much as he had tried, he is still not able to speak any Naija language, unless pidgin english follow for naija language. lol
Jumoke Verissimo..a self confessed tom boy, (having grown up among boys) was her usual smiling self. Her book, I am memory makes a good read too.

Adunni Bimbo Adelakun, a journalist and writer, read from her book, Under the brown rusted roofs.. Rib cracking and humorous with very funny characters and conversations, it was obvious it was going to be a good read.

After the readings, guitar toting Kafayat gave a beautiful rendition of her song- I am free.

The writers were asked a lot of questions by the audience who relished the chance that was given to them. Odia Ofeimun, further regaled us with stories of his early days as a writer and how he survived in the UK as a writer.
I scanned the audience, and sighted the author of Unbridled..Jude Dibia, Onyekachi Nwelue of The Abyssinian Boy, and modern poet..Chiedu Ifeozo.

Afterwards, there was a book party and shortly after that, I called it a day. I had to work the next day. I was glad I attended because the self belief to continue with my long abandoned work was renewed. I also needed the company and the people I met ... I had a mixed grill of a week..the week before this...shout out to DB and Burracup!!!
As I left no 55 Raymond Njoku street, SW Ikoyi... I couldn't help but notice the spring that suddenly crept into in my step.
I knew my MOJO was back!

It is 2am...what are you up to?

2009-04-29T02:12:00.004+01:00

It is actually 2.13am..I am at work...chasing paper...lol
what are you doing?
I know I have not said this before, but here it is...I am a true hip hop head. I just can't get enough of rap music..as much as I love coldplay to death..the Erasmus, linkin park( God bless their souls), the fray, matchbox 20, the ting tings, hoobanstank....I love rap...infact Naija rap..
MI...Ill bliss, Mode9, Naeto, Killz, Saucekid, Kelz, Whizkid, Ice prince, jesse jags..these are the future of Hip hop in Nigeria..condemning the likes of rugged man, freestyle etc to the annals of history. It will take a super human effort for rugged to up the standard set by hommies like Naeto and MI...These guys came and turned the volume up some notches...

You wonder where I am going with this...I was not paid to do this oo..but this morning..I was listening to Ikechukwu..life and times of kills, vol 1..and the content was amazing. i can't remember the last time I heard a crappy rap song...the videos are even mad... for the past one year..every major album has been up to par...

I saw this somewhere, and I am like ''can you imagine the level of talent in nigeria...These talents have been wasting for like God knows how long.
At some point, South Africa was controlling music in the continent..now naija don dust them like mahd!

I am so glad that this happening now..

On the flipside...have you guys seen this?
so razz...

I just thought to share this ( it was sent to my fb inbox) in case you are game..
9 WRITERS, 4 CITIES: THE BOOK TOUR

If you live in Nigeria, there's a book tour featuring some of Nigeria's literary greats starting from May 2nd to Saturday June 6th 2009, nine Nigerian writers will embark on a book tour to 4 cities across Nigeria. The event is themed 9 Writers, 4 Cities: The Book Tour, and it is a series of book readings, book signings and discussions. Each event will be recorded and made available for download online. The series of weekend readings will hold in Benin, Ibadan, Lagos and Warri. The first event, which is to be hosted by Writers Anonymous at the African Artists Foundation in Lagos, will be followed by a ‘Book Party’.

The participating writers are: Odia Ofeimun (poet and author of The Poet Lied), Toni Kan (author of Nights of a Creaking Bed), Lindsay Barrett (journalist, poet and author of several books, including Song for Mumu), Jumoke Verissimo (author of I am Memory), Tade Ipadeola (a lawyer and author of the poetry collection A Sign of Times), Joy Isi Bewaji (author of Eko Dialogue), Eghosa Imasuen ( medical doctor and author of To Saint Patrick), A. Igoni Barrett (managing editor of Farafina magazine and author of From Caves of Rotten Teeth) and Bimbo Adelakun ( journalist and author of Under the Brown Rusted Roofs).

The series of events will take place at the following places:

Ø Lagos: Saturday, 2nd May, 2009 at the African Artists Foundation, No 54, Raymond Njoku Street, Ikoyi, Lagos. Time: 2-7pm

Ø Lagos: Sunday, 17th May at The Palms Shopping Mall, Lekki Express Way, Lekki. Time: 2-7pm

Ø Lagos: Saturday 6th June, 2009 at the African Artists Foundation, No 54, Raymond Njoku Street, Ikoyi, Lagos. Time 2-5pm
The 6-week tour will be reported on the Farafina magazine blog, The Farafinist. Audio and video recordings of each reading will also be placed on the Switched On website as podcasts. Dada Books, Daylight Media and Auggust Media are also media partners in this project.

The dates and venues of the Benin, Warri and Ibadan events will be sent out soon.

I will certainly be there and I hope I would meet some of the members from the group there as well.

For further information, please call 07061141232, email auggustmedia@gmail.com

Have a wonderful week.

Kind Regards,
Chiedu Ifeozo.

A potpourri of nothing..actually..

2009-04-26T19:20:00.005+01:00

Peeps....Won Beri! I think it means I salute...in yoruba slang parlance..... but the song and video is tight. Knighthouse is the future!

It has been a minute.
How una dey?

I went for a routine test...There was some sort of viral outbreak at my workplace...so we were sent to the clinic to get tested. Abi Hiv dey fly for air now?

After my vitals were checked by the nurse, I sat down in the waiting room along with other patients waiting to see the doctor..

By my side sat a very heavily pregnant woman with her young son in tow. The boy who appeared to be about two years was shrieking and wailing foe his mum to give him a piggy back ride ( I hope I got it right). The weight the woman had in front was enormous because she was even sitting down in a funny way.. and the boy wanted to ride. The boy kept wailing and some of the patients were already getting impatient with the boy. I decided to give the boy the ride, to save the mum the stress and to make the boy quit wailing like a banshee.

When I beckoned to him to come, the boy stopped crying and an insolent look carefully settled down on the boy's face..

''look at this lil' bugger'' I muttered to myself...

He was giving me this dirty look as if I had shit on my back. Stupid spoilt brat! He was lucky his mum was willing to give him a ride while she looked as if she was going to deliver any moment.
I sat back and thought about events of the past week....

I ran into an old school mate, at the airport and how we played catch up...
My inability to post regularly on my blog...
My apparent lack of motivation towards facebook nowadays..( is anyone with me?)
To some very difficult memes' I saw this week...( 100 truths?) I no fit oo lol

My mind wandered to my strange encounter with Bukkie/ stalker...

When she turned around, after scanning the room for Nike, she looked at her phone and saw the last dialed number..she looked at me strangely, then she dialed the number again...after some seconds, my phone started ringing..I 'formed' as if I didn't know what was happening.

She looked at me, an there was a brief flash of anger in her eyes, then she said..
''You didn't figure we were going to meet this way, huh?''
''no...I didn't figure'' I admitted

She looked at me and then went on to tell me how mellow and infectious my voice was and how she thought about me everyday...and finally when I refused to see her...She could not believe it because people hardly said no to her. she also said she wasn't disappointed now that she had seen me physically and that she hoped something more than the normal friendship will come up between us.

All through this monologue, I was mute...probably because this was the first time a lady whom I considered to be ''all that'' was telling me face to face without mincing words, how much of me she wanted...

I saw her off to her 2009 honda crv, and I promised to call her to make sure she was home. As she drove away, I wondered what was wrong with this ''seemingly beautiful scenery''?

She was good looking, infact 'hawt', ( wetin my yankee brothas dey call dime piece and eye candy) she worked and obviously successful in what she did, upwardly mobile had the good things of life. If my guys see me with her, my rep go rise...

Well...I don't need to be seen with her for my rep to rise... My rep is already on point!
I am usually after what is inside than what is outside....
I have never been the one to look for rich ladies to prey on...
I have..

DANTE!!

I just realized that the nurse had been calling my name to see the doctor. I made my way to consulting room 8, knocked on the door and entered.
Face to face with this pretty looking female doctor....

God! why are you tormenting me with beautiful ladies?

ad continuim....

2009-04-20T03:23:00.006+01:00

Continued from here..........

....I froze.

Oblivious of the change, and probably well into the song, she ground into me, her tight skirted bum further heightened my already tense member.
Sparing just a moment of thought, i decided to go ahead with the flow and get my groove on; 'mini me' had at that point, successfully carried out a mutiny against me and was straining seriously against my jeans. She held onto my hand which wrapped around her waist and we were locked together in our dance of lust..

With each new track, Bukkie's audacity grew until we were facing each other, my knees in between her thighs, barely grazing there...., groin to groin, breast to chest, lips barely apart..., my hands casually resting at the top of that mound that she had as buttocks.

I looked at her..her eyes cloudy and hooded, skin...flushed and desire ran through my body. I knew I had to control myself: If I no get to shine that congo ( thank you Vera for that term..shine that congo..lol) issue fit dey...

''I don't know why, but I like you'' She whispered into my ears. And to emphasize this, she kissed the tip of my ears, down to the side of my neck.
I shuddered. In a good way.
''Really?'' I said...wondering where that came out from.

I have never really understood how someone can claim to like you after knowing you for a few minutes. I guess it works for some people, not for me.

''Yes, really. I feel like I have known you all my life''
I was plotting graphs in my head...probabilities, subtractions, additions, divisions and arithmetic progressions, wondering how to get Bukkie to go home with me. At that moment, I was willing to wipe my bed free of my 4month old celibacy...

She looked at her watch, sighed and gently broke away from me...
''have to go, waking up early for work tomorrow'' she brought out her phone..a blackberry bold....very classy.. and asked for my number...''let's hook up over the weekend, you hear'' she said with a knowing twinkle in her eyes.

I gave her my number and asked her to flash me, so I could get hers.

While she was trying to flash me, she turned around to see if she could see Nike probably to let her know that she was about to leave.. I looked at my phone to check her number...

That was when I saw IT!

STALKER.
080********
calling

Life is so so funny...

2009-04-19T00:45:00.005+01:00

I have been away for some time. Partly, cos I was considering a few things...There is a whole part of me that I am still not comfortable revealing...maybe in due time.

During the Easter break, i stalked all the blogs...nothing! Immediately I went off duty, Piam!!, everyone updated. Haba!!! I no even near 5th...lol. This is not fair...even my personal people no even give me heads up....

While grappling with a customer on Easter Monday..( Yes I worked), My phone which should have been on silent beeped....and Talib Kweli's Hostile gospel (yup! I love that song..It was shot at the Afrika shrine in gidi) came up..

I flipped to the inbox..

''sup? what time are you getting off?
I am shop rite...i have a gbedu...
are u game? hola''

My mate Jay has been trying, albeit unsuccessfully to pair me up with somebody by inviting me to all those upscale parties that he was always attending...I had declined a couple of times, and I have no intention of accepting this invite too.

The whining voice of the customer reached me where I was already lost in thoughts...
''Are you with me?''

''Yes'', I quickly answered ''You wanted the gprs settings, right?''

After work...I thought about it. My life has settled into this rhythm of work and the house..I have been on the same page of Paul Coelho's The alchemist for more than 3 months. I used to read like crazy..but now...that one na story for another day..

So what was I actually going home to?

Maybe to finish up the season 3 of criminal minds that I was watching?

To enjoy the amazing fish stew I made the previous day? ( that stew turned out so nice eh...lol)

After a few home truths, I decided to hook up with Jay.

@ Shoprite, I alighted from the staff bus, made my way in, where I saw him at food court munching on some bones..abi na chicken...

''I thought you said you were not coming...yeye boy'' he attacked me

''I thought you said you were going to a party...food no go dey there?'' I quickly retorted

Grinning wickedly....''I dey go rock..food ke?''

After a few phone calls and a bit of idling around..(I window shopped joo and saw some crazy Hublot big bang watches in one of the shops... Eh $29,000 for a watch? ejoooo!

We got to the party place...somewhere off Osborne road, Ikoyi and Jay's colleague who was the host immediately handed two glasses of wine to us..as if her sole aim was to get us drunk as soon as possible. I have never been one for drinks so I nursed my drink while I looked around, trying to find someone interesting.

Across the room, I spot this lady..it was obvious she came from work too 'sod she wore a formal shirt with a pencil skirt that accentuated her hips. The skirt actually started a lil bit below her boobs and molded her figure so well. I guess I stared cos she cocked her to one side and gave me a look that was like''hello?''

I looked away and continued to nurse my drink.

30 minutes later...still standing, now looking a bit lost, I was now sticking out like a sore thumb. The party had come alive and people were paired up, or in groups....chatting, dancing and generally mingling.

Up comes Jay's colleague ( the party host ) whom I now knew as Nike and drags me off, wanting to introduce me to somebody...Out to the balcony and straight to...the pencil skirted lady...

''Ahem...''I quickly cleared my throat because it inexplicably suddenly went dry.

''Bukkie, meet Dante'' and Nike was gone......just like that.

''How are you?'' I asked after some seconds of silence....

''Ok''

''I am sorry for staring at you earlier'' I ventured....

''It's really ok'' She smiled and damn! was the smile sweet?

After a short while, we were chatting away like oldies.

Then we danced and I could smell the armani code when she leaned in..and even when she turned around and backed up to me..giving me the benefit of her backside..in a very fleeting and transient movement. She teased me..trying to make me ask for more. I swore under my breathe never to beg for it. Kai..the devil is a liar...
The DJ switched modes and went straight to naija songs...Wande Coal's bumper to bumper came on. Moving on cue, she turned and I moved in for the kill..grabbing her waist...impure thoughts flooding my system with adrenaline...
She didn't move away, instead she gave me the grind and I remembered a post I read on someone's page... about grinding...haaa! grinding?
Then I felt something stir to life....

...in between my legs.

Life is like a piece of coin, You can choose to toss it around but you can only spend it once.

2009-04-12T11:17:00.005+01:00

hmm...Happy Easter folks...

I am at work...on an Easter day ( that sucks bah?) , lol listening to a Jeremy Camp devotional.. and it hit me how much of God I need in my life. I try to run things my way and I end up making a mess of things. I think I am in control but I end up watching things fall apart..

I am holding unto things..things I think that are so dear and this prevents God from taking his place in my life. After praying this morning..I decided to take it one step at a time...first..i need to let go, some of friends who are neither beneficial nor encouraging...beneficial in the aspect of self development and my walk with God...

Then...the rest will follow in a natural sequential order....

In all...drawing some bit of inspiration from the title, I intend to live my life to the fullest, no holds barred...but with God as a guide..How I am going to do that...no idea. I guess I just need to trust HIM.

I don't really have much to say...just in a sober, reflective mood...

I guess the whole of bloggsville is too 'cos I have been stalking y'all for the past 2 days and nobody did anything... peeps..abeg, come and save me from boredom...and post something..

I stumbled upon a blog and i think it will benefit those in Las gidi...this lady does some mad metal and leather designs for interior decor. I don't know how expensive or cheap her stuff is , but they are cool. Me, I need to 'tush' up my house well, well..lol....I will check her out at her office in Ikeja..Eni Leda's blog is worth visiting...in my opinion ooo! lol and She didn't pay me for this PR, in case you are wondering ...lol

Thank you guys for the help I got the other time, as per the link thing..I am able to do it now...so your favorite student is back with another request...How do I add the shout mix application and the audio player?
I logged on to their respective sites and I registered...but the result was a mumbo jumbo of HTML codes and when it comes to that aspect, I can't do jack to save my life....wetin I go do?
..

Sweet, senior Q.....

2009-04-06T21:59:00.002+01:00

I have been away for a minute...

Work and official assignments took me away from my beloved pc and i was unable to access my page even from my mobile piece.

Well...stale news...I am back.

I am sorry for cutting my gist short. I have this very nosy colleague. He is the type that will just 'super impose' himself behind you and just be moping at your screen and trying to read or see everything you are doing. Dude is so silly that sometimes I feel like smacking him up a bit, maybe to see if it will make the wires in his brain touch; maybe the brain will begin to work properly again.
The other day, I was typing a rejoinder/ response to a newspaper article, the guy came smiling sheepishly as usual..hovered around my system then planted himself behind me like a wall painting. Next thing I knew, the guy was telling me that I made a mistake in a sentence: ''it is not their, it is there''
I whirled around '' are you high? get the f*$&!! away from me..idiat!!!''

So the last time I was posting, dude comes up to me, laughing in his quirky, nervous manner, he informs me that he just opened a blogger account and he wants me to 'invite' him so that he will read what I have been writing...
I looked at him and really wondered if i heard right.
Like...dude, how did you know I had a blogger account?

I felt like all those cop characters in 'The wire'..I have been made, I have been made! my cover has been blown!, abort operation! lol. But then, I thought about it, it will take a million demons to stop me from blogging! Period! So that dude is a no issue! If you are reading this now..Dude..don't let me catch you on my page...lol

Now that I have dispensed with that, let's get down to the nitty gritty....

''...come here'' he ordered in a gruff voice..

That was when I knew i had entered.

I began to cry and this seemed to excite him. His breathe was coming in short and heavy bursts. He grabbed his now enlarged 'member' and shoved it towards me..
''come and touch'' he told me in a very strange, unearthly voice
With tears running down my cheeks, I shook my head and that was when it hit me like a 1000 watt bulb...eureka!

When I was in primary school, in order to escape the numerous punishments I was entering daily, I had perfected the art of the epileptic jerk with the foaming at the mouth and the rolling of the eyes ( sorry folks, I had to survive one way or another). I was so good that the teachers stopped flogging me in primary 5.

The issue was: I was used to rolling around on normal floors not in a lavatory with expired piss all over the place.

My mind was made up when he started towards me with a distinct single mindedness...I told myself that by fire or by snow..that thing was not going near my mouth.

I threw myself down, down into that pool of piss, that had gathered over the days. As I hit the ground, the ammonia like smell was stifling. I began my act. My eyes rolled back and my pupils disappeared..I foamed at the mouth and my legs started jerking.
The pervert took a look at me ( I guess he was so excited, he didn't even care if I was dying), moved to a corner, spat into his hands and began to wank as if his life depended on it.
While performing my life saving act, I peeped at him and saw him with his trousers bunched around his ankles doing these strange up and down movements ( I didn't know what wanking was then).

Paying me no attention, he continued with his doings, alternating the oohs with some ahhs, until he came, shooting some strange white pap like 'solution' on the lavatory wall. Gathering his trousers, he took a quick look at me, and exited the lavatory, sharp sharp.

After what appeared to be eternity, i picked myself up, dripping piss and all and ran as fast as my legs could carry me to the teacher's quarters where my best friend lived in his aunt, the maths teacher's house.

Even after a week of thorough scrubbing, I still smelt the piss on my body. I avoided senior Q like a plague and the day I accidentally ran into him on my way to the staff room, he looked through me as if I didn't exist. Even when I went to vice principal special duties to report the incident, no one believed me ( i was almost punished for peddling rumors about sweet senior Q) because he led the hymns during the morning assembly.

Fast forward 7 years later, while I was in the university, I worked in a cyber cafe as the network/ web administrator, manager etc. Then one cool evening, senior Q enters...dressed in a dapper suit, with a young, baby faced guy in tow. He proceed to give me a bear hug while I cringed and informed with with a flourish that he was now a youth pastor and had his own ministry with a focus on young boys in order to guide them in the right path and to make them ready to become the leaders of tomorrow.

Chai!! fresh meat!!. Young boys again? to be abused?

He spent some time on line, then he went away. I tried not to judge him. But I could not shake off the feeling I had about him. In spite of the suit and the whole toga of being a pastor, I still remembered him slapping me and asking me to come and touch his d*&k. His visits to my cafe became frequent and he started coming for all night browsing, always choosing one particular system that was secluded. I checked his browsing history and it had a lot of gay and incest ( father and son) sites. Being the admin, I had the privilege to view his screen with Xview ( a feature on cafe billing program that allowed me to view customers screens live while they are browsing) and i saw him viewing those gay and incest porn sites. I confronted him and he stammered away. he left before it was daylight and I have never seen him again.

I am sure he is somewhere under the guise of youth ministry, abusing some young boys who have been left in his care. I have forgiven him.... but I know I have not forgotten. But if he is still abusing young boys, God will surely judge him one day.

My blog roll is increasing daily. Just a few days away and I have like 21 posts to catch up with. people are updating by the minutes.
Temite, bumight, tigress..it's been a minute..sup?, DB, scribbles, afrobabe, CLG, BSNC, XSN, Rita, Bibi, Vera, Funms, Baroque, Roc, Tisha, Chari, buttercup, NDQ, dabizniz, and everyother blogger that I am not able remember now..you guys rock!

Finally...tell me this is not true! wtf!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGcMz8HUPyY

I NO WANT.....neither did I!

2009-03-31T23:05:00.000+01:00

Hi blogsville...sup?

I have spent the past few days doing a few things...reading past posts of Tigress in order to really know her. Shebi..that is what you need to do if you are trying to chyke someone abi? Reading her blog has opened my eyes to a few things...no wonder she called her blog "too much for one man" lol..

I also hit five firsts this week... me 5!. I was on a roll...according BSNC. lol

Anyways some interesting posts from DB, BSNC and Bibi also spiced up my week. Back to BSNC's, I was actually reminded of a similar incident when I was in jss 2. There was this very wicked senior student whom I would prefer to call Q. Q had this special cane that he used to go about with, delivering and dispensing lashes and strokes of cane with the calmness of a trial judge. I was a constant victim and until today, I am unable to give any concrete reason why he picked on me so much.

Second term of Jss2, He suddenly stopped. Just like that! As a thoroughbred Ibo boy, that was strange....maka na awo anaghi agba aso ehhe n'nkiti... The frog does not run in the afternoon for nothing's sake... He became so nice. He started giving me cabin biscuit, milk and sugar and also started buying puff puff for me. I used to eat ooo, no doubt but with one eye open and with one leg out of the door incase I had to run.

Then one day, we were staying back in school for the after school lectures in preparation for the junior WAEC, he came in and ordered me to follow him. Suspecting that he was in foul mood, I followed without wasting time. I didn't want to be at the recieving end of his cane.
Serious faced, he marched me straight to the lavatory behind the assembly hall, shoved me into a corner and asked me to strip.

STRIP?

As I was wondering if I heard right, a heavy slap landed on my cheeks and stars flew.. I looked at him and he had this glazed look as if he was high on something...
I started pulling on my shorts and my stupid belt chose that particular time to hook and refused to unbuckle. Another slap helped me to loosen the belt and at the same time, I let out a whimper...
A very stern look on his face and I just stifled the whimper...
He reached into his trousers and brought out his engorged member and my eyes literally felt out of the sockets..

"Jesus of Nazareth!" I screamed inside..
All the weenies I had seen at that time were little just like mine and the only part of the female anatomy I had seen were on the pages of my mum's copy of every woman.

This was unlike anything I had seen before...with viens scattered around the fierce some thing....

Before I could arrange for a plan b, Q commanded me in a very gruff voice..."come here.....!".....

Watch out for part 2:

My stalker is back. She called late this evening with yet another strange number..I fear this is going to be one hell of a weekend...

Saw this somewhere...Take a look at it and let me know what you think...

Paid to do it, but fails to make his friend's wife pregnant after 72 attempts

In Stuttgart, Germany, a court judge must decide on a case of honorable intentions in a situation where a man hired his neighbor to get his wife pregnant.

It seems that Demetrius Soupolos, 29, and his former beauty queen wife, Traute, wanted a child badly, but Demetrius was told by a doctor that he was sterile.
So, Soupolos, after calming his wife's protests, hired his neighbor, Frank Maus, 34, to impregnate her. Since Maus was already married and the father of two children, plus looked very much like Soupolos to boot, the plan seemed good.

Soupolos paid Maus $2500 for the job and for three evenings a week for the next six months, Maus tried desperately, a total of 72 different times to impregnate Traute.
When his own wife objected, he explained, "I don't like this any more than you. I'm simply doing it for money. Try and understand."

When Traute failed to get pregnant after six months, however Soupolos was not understanding and insisted that Maus have a medical examination, which he did.

The doctor's annoucement that Maus was also sterile shocked everyone except his wife, who was forced to confess that Maus was not the real father of their two children.

Now, Soupolos is suing Maus for breach of contract in an effort to get his money back, but Maus refuses to five it up because he said he did not guarantee conception but only that he would give an honest effort.

A bitter sweet tale of resolve, love and Manolos...

2009-03-28T10:12:00.000+01:00

I woke up this morning, feeling very unsatisfied with a whole lot of things...My relationship with God, my life, where I am etc... The one with God is the one that irks me most...I just can't seem to put in that required effort that I know is needed. I only rush to him when I have issues that I need him to solve and most times, It is like I am on him bugging him, expecting him to do it now!, now!, then when it is done, I skip away to continue to live my life. If God was human...sigh...Im for don show me by now.

I am resolving to give God more time in my life..daily. I know it is a journey and I am praying that I am able to keep to my resolve...read my bible on the regular, meditate and seek his face in all the things I do.. and I know all the other things I have struggling to get..a'la my Vfr will be added unto me...CAN SOMEONE SHOUT AMEN?!! lol

Moving forward...(one of lecturers then, loved this phrase) I came across something this morning and I just want to share with you, blog fam... This was off my friend, James Amuta's facebook page..a young and promising poet. Though he doesn't know it, he actually motivates me a whole lot... when you can, please visit www.jamesamuta.com, and show him some love.. + his book- Enigma: beyond the poet is available in book stores, and I am sure on amazon.com...

A Long Note on Being Single

Wed 4:54pm

Sometimes the pains of loneliness can be felt in places where it hurts more than a sharp kick to the groin. Yes, sometimes companionship isn’t just required for physical purposes only. As one gets older, companionship takes on a broader perspective – and once this happens the search for a soul mate becomes almost elusive, warranting compromised tastes in ones choice of a long-term companion. I would know better, because like many, the prime of my youth was spent pursuing wanton thrills, and many frivolous activities. And the pain of loneliness intensifies when I imagine the number of people just like me – who swim in the ocean of plenteous friends, and yet subjected to the battery of the scorching sun in the desert of loneliness. Some of us replace our need for emotional attachments with our desire for career advancement. We lie to ourselves that we only care about our jobs, but when the reality sets in – we wallow in the inherent confusion and regret, groping frantically in the dark in a desperate attempt to make that purposeful connection that will inevitably (or supposedly) save our hearts from extinction.

But why is it so difficult in this age and time, especially in this city to find a suitable companion? Why is it that more successful career ladies and gentlemen subscribing to speed dating services?
These days, it’s not about love anymore for most people – it’s about finding someone with whom they share a reasonable dose of similar values with – the love part, if that happens, to them, is always an unexpected bonus. While some stubborn romantics believe in falling in love before settling down with a companion, more pragmatic individuals are embracing the theory that “half a loaf of bread is better than chin-chin”.

So, where does this leave people like me? People who live in the cave of their own minds – People who refuse to believe in the existence of a world outside the serenity of that which has been erected in the confines of their imagination. People who understand the harsh nature of reality, but at the same time locked in a constant duel to dismiss the obvious by living in their own alternate reality.
You see – people like me, who drift off while talking about companionship, veering into the realm of incomprehensible mumbo jumbo.

Anyway, the truth of the matter is that we are losing sight of what dating and companionship is all about. And you all should stone me for that – because I have just spoken like a true hypocrite. And will continue. Why is it that even when we find ourselves in a ‘sexual’ relationship – we still feel “single” and unattached? Have we suddenly lost all respect for sex, or have we finally realized that sex alone is not the foundation to build a relationship (or companionship) upon?

Have we been brainwashed into practicing classism by a very materialistic world that evaluates everything of the merits of its ‘providing’ power? Are our young men getting more disillusioned – have they been brain washed by MTV into setting their sights on ladies that match the beauty of those graphically-enhanced video vixens?

I don’t care if I’m making sense or not with this note – all I know is that I’m not happy with what my status update says on FB. Someone better proffer solutions that will help me update it to something meaningful – and not rush of to reverse it any time soon. [I wish I was joking] But anyway, I’d had a change of heart, and believe me I’m enjoying this note. I’m just saying what a lot of brothers would love to say – but like me, I guess guys are just too lazy for the ‘companionship’ thingy – it’s easier to score one-night-shags than to find someone who complements you in mind, soul, and body.

But, if there ever was a time – then the time is now!

---From the unpublished manuscripts of James Amuta

I don't know how to add this kind of link.. I have seen this on either Afrobabe or BSNC's blog pages, where the names of other bloggers when mentioned in a note are highlighted and when you click on them, they will take you to those blog pages.. someone pls teach me..

I promised CLG a Manolo..well here it is.. so... I hope you like it.

Now...these below are for tigress..I didn't promise to get some for her but since I am trying to chyke.... I have to get some for her..abi..lol

So..Tigress..lol keep them well, cos we will go out with them when you come to las gidi...This one cost small oh..so na for special days and occasions. lol
Houristra Leopard-Print d’Orsay heels

But...as I was leaving the shop..I saw someone wearing these and I am like damn!! I don't know how shapely your legs are, maybe you'll send a photo of your legs...wink * wink* so I will look at them, then, I'll see if I'll get these for you. If there is anyone you don't like..let me know, I will send it back, immediately. lol

Finally..I wish everyone a great weekend..God bless...

More pictures..less words..

2009-03-27T14:40:00.000+01:00

This morning was almost a nightmare. Just after CMS almost opposite the MUSON centre, the truck in the picture carrying the yellow containers either lost control (that is the only logical conclusion I can reach at this point) and totally blocked the road. Okadas could not even pass. The traffic was so bad that third mainland bridge was also affected. Ah!, this was one of those times, I wished I was able to teleport...piam! lol..

Even, when the third mainland bridge was being worked on...it was not like this ooo

See Okada everywhere..they were like bees....

They could not even pass....

Since I have decided to work with photos today, I am wondering what entered Kanye west's head....his new girlfriend looks like a bimbo ( damn! she has a booty on her!). At Alexis looked decent enough..I don't know oo. His choice, I guess...

kanye and amber...

Honest scrap award and the meme thingy...

2009-03-24T07:46:00.000+01:00

haaa....tigress. You got me this time. I am doing this only because I am your e- baby, lol.

What is your favorite food?- fufu, vegetable soup

How tall are you?- 5ft 11

If you could have one super human power what would you choose? - teleportation

Define yourself in 3 words... funny, nice , laid back

Where’s ur significant other? - Still looking, I guess....

Your hair colour? - black

Your favorite things: my I pod

Your dream goal? own and manage a top flight advert and brand management agency by 2013

The room you’re in? My office..been here all night...

Your hobby? Asides supporting arsenal fiercely, and stalking all your blogs, playing fifa 2009 on my psp.

Where u wanna be in six years- managing my ad and branding agency, here in Lagos..

Where were you last night? at work..

What you’re not? stuck up and up tight

One of your wish list items: a land rover l3 hybrid..

What are you wearing? –an army issued cardigan on a pair of faded, really faded blue jeans..

Your computer? - compaq presario

Your mood: tired, sleepy....

Something you’re not wearing? a wedding ring....

Love someone? I plead the fifth! lol

Your favorite colour? blue...

Last time you laughed? last night..reading LG's blog. I wan die with laff..

Last time you cried? it's been long tho.(sorry folks, yeah i did..watching the champ for an umpteenth time)

Are you a bitch- NO

Favorite pastime: Drawing my curtains, burrowing myself into my couch and watching movies all day..

Any vices? - trusting a lil bit too much for my own good and until recently, being generous to a fault....

Pro life or wire hanger: Definitely pro life...

Mccain or Obama: Obama...he represents that fact that as humans, we will continue to push the envelope..

Pro-plastic or natural: pro plastic until i snag that special woman, then naturally skintight all the way...

Dream job? Do you remember I told you about my ad and branding agency? Top flight, no doubt!

I decided to add a few of mine. For those that really want to know me...

1. I believe I am destined for very great things

2. Am a certified romantic ( almost a sucker..lol).....it's the little things that matter.

3 Give me a good book & am happy for hours( I just started Paulo Coelho's the alchemist), give me a pile of movies, you won’t see me for days.

4. Have a heavy phobia for water.. I almost drowned in a pool in my 1st year at the university. Can’t be caught dead near a pool. My folks don’t know till date.

5. Had a phobia for heights and flying, which I fought to a standstill in 2006. It was ironical, because, when I was 3, I almost flew off our third floor balcony with a blue bedspread/ makeshift cape tied around my neck thinking I was the man of steel. Luckily, our next door neighbor spotted me dragging a chair to the edge of the balcony, which I wanted to use to get some leverage to the balcony and in turn take a hike to nowhere! I hope to sky dive soon. Lol..it is in my bucket list, anyway.

6. Really want to learn how to ride a motor bike, and get myself a suzuki hayabusa, or a honda vfr 1000cc… and zoom off into the night.

7. Am on a high when I am driving alone… I get to speed the way I want…, I once made lagos to owerri in 7 hours. I was 25. In fact, I have a need for speed! There, I have finally said it!

8. My best friend really..is my dad. I have mad love for him. He’s got my back like no other (errr...except for momsy, lol) and my loyalty to him is bluetooth!

9. I find it almost difficult to finish personal stuff I started.. I have 3 unfinished novels that I am writing buried at the bottom of my red box in my ward robe…( if I catch you near my box eh…) i am working on it, tho'

10. I was shy, very shy until I was 21.

11. Love kids..so much. If my wife (when I meet her) will be game, I want to have a lot of kids..Maybe, seven or eight. Lol. I intend work closely with NGO’s for children and to set up a charity for orphans.

12. I want to work in an Ad agency/ Branding and marketing communications. Gosh, really do!
Infact, I want to own and manage mine...

13. A lot of times, I have been able to see things before they happen. Twice I told people close to me, they laughed me to scorn.I have not been able to tell anyone else. I still see some things.

14 I used to have a maaaaaaad crush on Megan Good…I still respect Shawn Corey Carter aka ‘Jay z ‘ to death. He made me understand that Impossibility is nothing.

15. I am so so proud of the fact that I am good cook. Knack your head on a concrete wall. lol

16. I cried once while watching The Champ (1979) starring Jon voight, as Billy ‘the champ’Flynn, Ricky Schroeder as TJ, his son and faye Dunaway, Annie, his love interest. Damn I don’t know why… maybe because of the emotional father and son plot and this sad scene, when the champ dies:
Billy: I won the fight, are you happy?
Tj: yeah, you are the champ, you always come through.
Then the champ dies,
Tj: what’s the matter champ?
Champ, wake up, wake up, don’t sleep now; we got to go home, champ, champ!!
At this point, tears are welled up in my eyes and i am already beginning to cry. lol
(Doesn’t make me less of a man; you can find out for yourself at your own risk)

I feel spent...jeezz!!!

Dream I must....sleep i need.

2009-03-22T19:42:00.000+01:00

I have been having these recurring dreams for the past few days. I have changed my sheets, changed sleeping positions, yet they dreams do not want to let me be. Kai!!. I have longed for this bike. Honda VFR 950, 2008 edition with the Ivtec engine...I have dreamt of it and the dreams are threatening to take over my everyday life..Everything I do I see them..wetin I go do eh?

I think I want the white one, with a matching helmet and kevlar suit. Ahhhhhhhhh!. sigh. This is the stuff dreams are made of..I hope to get to sleep this night. I am working early tommorrow..

The annoying case of job related irritants...

2009-03-22T18:07:00.000+01:00

My people, sup?

Happy mother's day to everyone's mothers. Your mothers are mine too.

[sigh] I love my ma..She is the best in the whole wide world, and she rocks madly too!!

I miss your food ma, and the way you look at me in the eyes and ask me if i want a second helping..

I love the way you shyly hugged when I came home after being away for a long time..

I love the way you snuggle up to pops..
the way you kiss him, when you think we are not looking...

I adore the way you fiercely have my back...

You are too much, joooo!! (Pop, no vex, your day is coming soon, lol)

Also, let us use this opportunity to pray for all the orphans who have grown up or are still growing up without the love and rare affection only a mother can give. May the good Lord continue to keep them...amen.

I visited BSNC's page and since then, i have had this overwhelming need / urge to pimp my page. I scoured the internet, looking for widgets and stuff to use and I came up with nothing. I decided to change the background color of my page from black to blue...still not satisfied with the outcome. I am still going to tinker with it a bit because it looks so bland. Someone help me, abeg..lol I am not too proud to learn.

Work has been a drag. Except for occassional flashes of excitement, the work has just been there.
Don't misunderstand me oooooo! lol. Job pays well and I get to meet a lot of people, albeit over the phone, but mehn!; sometimes, I feel like reaching into the phone, dragging the dumb arse on the other side over to my side and beating the crap out of him. They can stretch my patience eh?

Sometimes, I feel like ''I have seen them all, they can't get more stupid than this'', then out of nowhere, someone else coolly steps up to break the record. Record for stupidity? Who on earth goes around breaking stupid records abi na records for stupidity?

There is this particular dude that calls the customer care regularly, goes by the moniker of Shakur. With a phony accent, he still succeeds in giving himself away by answering ''yalz'' or ''yax'' to every question you ask him.

I have cussed him out in my mind and several times, had good laughs on his account. His stupidity has stretched my patience so much that it has seeped into my imagination. Anytime he calls, I quickly try to imagine what other stupid request or question he was going to bring to the table; a very difficult and daunting task, I must tell you.

Early this morning, Shakur calls in and proceeded to introduce himself as usual: with all the prefixes he could remember...

''goomoring, barr. dr. engr shakur, on the line..''

''my name is dante..How may I help you?''

''Yalz, yalz, I want gprs settings for my phone, daystar 6300''

''daystar ke'' I mutter under my breathe. ''is that chinese?''

''yalz, is anyrin wrong with that?''
'
'no.'' I proceeded to inform how he was going to getting the gprs settings for his type of phone.

''is there anything else you want me to help you with?''

''nah, nah...yalz, yax!! I wanna transfer credit from my phone to my baby's handset. when I try the thing, it was speaking english to me, yalz, you know?''

Before nko, wetin im go speak before? and pls quit with the yalz!!!

I asked for his 'baby's' phone number and the bugger gave me a number that belonged to another network. i went ballistics!!! what rubbish???? How does he want to transfer credit from one network to another?

I took a deep breath..''I'm sorry, you may not be able to transfer airtime from one network to another''
The mumu stupidly replied...''is it not the same naira that they are using?''
See me see arguement. He kept on arguing and in between that, kept calling me 'were' and 'banza'. lol. ''SEND THE CREDIT NOW, NOW!!!'' He kept on shouting.

I heaved a sigh of relief when he got off the phone.. issues, kai!

Next thing I knew, I heard my colleague saying''goodmorning, Shakur, how may I help you?''
''You are so on your own'' I mouthed at her....hahahaha

nothing!

2009-03-22T16:56:00.000+01:00

I am having issues, posting. each time i try to post, some annoying html related errors show up. i am trying hard to increase the font size and i can't. I am still working on it tho'

Memories of foxy and the different cards dealt by life

2009-03-20T16:59:00.000+01:00

Aha! I am back to civilization. I worked on Sunday night, so I was off the whole of Monday, Tuesday and I got in on Wednesday. lol I went straight to a training for a new technology being deployed in my workplace. I was itching to get to my page.. Alas, the internet in the training room was disabled because some stupid dude decided to browse while the training was going and he was caught at it by no other person than the director of customer care! Suffice to say that one week suspension is the only form of browsing and access he is going to get..

Anyways, finally got to my page and I did a double take! 17 comments? Even Bumight was there and Afrobabe? lol... ok ooooo

Well...slow...That is how my life has been. Very slow.. The only company I have had or I have now are my MI cds: talk about it and the Illegal copy. I know most of the lyrics by heart now... I was moving my body to one track and I remembered that it has been long since I danced. ah ah..The new steps that I see in music videos, I am not sure I can do.. Talk about elanta..hahahaha

There is a particular track on talk about it, that makes me so sober and reflective. I think it is track 13..it goes like this..money slow enter ehhhh... money quick to go eh....

I remember when I was young. I didn't grow up rich; I didn't grow up so poor...But times were real hard. Food was hard to come by. Most evenings, supper was a simple meal of corn meal. I hated that and several times, I cried myself to sleep because I refused to eat it and there was no alternative. Looking back, I now understand the sad look in my mom's eyes; sad and helpless. Probably wished she was able to give me something else apart from the corn meal..
It made us stronger though; and independent too. We could not afford to pay or feed another mouth so there was no space for a house help. We took turns cooking for the family. At first it was the despicable and much hated corn meal; a simple recipe of finely ground corn, which is stirred continuously until it thickens. On good days, crayfish/ dry fish was added for a whole different taste. When things got better, the menu got better. Fish stew, goat meat etc lol were included in the menu. Rice was no longer on sundays only...

One of those good days, Poppa went to market and came back with a couple of chicks. He said we were going to rear them, sell some and keep one for easter. There was this particular chick that had black streaks and looked sickly. That was the one my lil' sister took to. Before you could say jack...! She had given the chick a name. Foxy? For a sickly looking chick? Who im wan fox? We fed them and by March, they were grown, including foxy, who no longer looked sickly. By this time, Foxy was so attached to my sister that she could stroll up to my sister and pick corn off her palm. I used to look at them incredulously and wonder if my eyes were lying.
A week to Easter, the chickens were sold to my mom's colleagues at the school where she taught then and the foxy one was kept to be feasted upon on Easter Sunday. The proceeds from the sold chicken were used to buy new chicks. Because of this, foxy was ousted from the pen and my dad advised that a stick with a rope be tied to her leg so that she would not have to go far, since we had big plans for her...Wink * wink*
I think my sister realized that the plans we had for her dear foxy and she went on a hunger strike. Hunger strike? lol. My cousin and I promptly diverted her food to the bottomless pits we had as stomachs. Boys were not smiling...
Good Friday...No show. Sis was tailing foxy up and down. All attempts to get her attention in order for us to kidnap foxy no work...Holy Saturday, something had to be done. My cousin told her he was going to buy Nasco wafers for her and not only that, he was getting all the flavours for her too: banana, chocolate etc. With so much glee, she ran off with him and I swung into action. In a jiffy, foxy was jerking around in a basin, in her final throes of death. As I watched the death dance, I couldn't get my eyes off the head, which I knew belonged to me by virtue of being the eldest son.

By the time my sister came back with my cousin, the deed was done and foxy was boiling away in a cauldron of sweet smelling spices. Funny, she didn't ask for him until the next afternoon. i.e Easter Sunday afternoon. After she had devoured a plate of rice and chicken leg lol (the mind of a four year old, hahaha) When she heard that foxy was dead and buried in different tummies, including hers, she went on a crying spree. It was only after poppa who couldn't just understand what the whole fuss was about, dealt her some strokes of cane, that she finally calmed down.
We laugh about it now and wonder what would have become of foxy if she did not meet that terrible end... Maybe by now, foxy would have graduated from high school...maybe...

Learning the hard way.

2009-03-15T18:45:00.000+01:00

Reading a post on Baroque's page, where he recounts a story of his stalker of a girl..I remember what happened a few weeks ago. I work in a telecoms company as a customer care executive. Having moved from a bank job ( i wasn't enjoying the enormous and almost unrealistic targets), I was required to start from customer care because I lacked the 'required ' telecoms experience. I was supposed to work in customer care until confirmation (1 year), and then I will move to my preferred unit; in this case, branding and marketing communications.

It was one of those public holidays...can't really remember which one it was. I know it was a public holiday, and I was working 'overtime'. I had a series of nasty and hoax callers. Some insulted me so much that I was tempted to give back a sharp retort or a very polite insult. But each time, I was held back by the fact that I had to be professional and that my calls were being recorded.
Then, out of the blues..a call came in. A very husky female voice tells me how she is having issues with her sim. As the call progressed, we got talking. She sounded interesting. After i took care of her issues, she told me that she loved my voice and that she would love to have my number.
Dang!! My head swelled up so bad that my face cap fell off.
Damn!! "Company policy miss, I am not allowed to give out my number''.
"Really...even to me? Ok. You have my number, call me when you can, you know where I stay"
And she hung up.

Hmm...I have never been one for blind dates, whatever you call 'em.
A colleague of mine had this experience when he got talking with a lady who called in. Nice voice. Husky, throaty laughter. The whole works. The swapped numbers and got real cozy. then they agreed to meet at a popular hangout, On the Run, Maryland. They time was for 10am, sharp guy got there by 9.30am to stake the place out, DEA style.
Lady got there by 10.02 and called him, he said he was yet to get there. He followed her inside.
MEEEHHNNN! The voice was far from the face. Shocked, he found himself a corner and dialled her again; just make doubly sure; that same voice flowed out of the mouth; the mouth that looked liked it had more than the regular 32. He just stood up and bailed!

I disagreed with him that looks were all it. I guess he had built some level of expectations 'cos of the voice.

I was going to give it a try because I lacked friends. Since I moved back to Lagos, I no sabi anybody. My life revolved around the house and work. So I gave her a call.
Warning no 1! She called me darling! Immediately she picked up and I introduced myself, darling! From where to where nah? Ok.. Let me not jump to conclusions..I heard people use all forms of endearment: baby, sweets, sweetheart, darling, etc in the UK. (I don't know, I have not been there) Maybe, she just returned...
Warning no 2! but when she said that she had been telling everyone about me and already told her friends that I was the best thing that happened to her...I was like "no way!! Today, today?"

Since then, I have turned down 3 dates at newscafé, a club night out at Aqua, deleted like a 100 text messages, 4 blatant sexual invitations. She is stalking me like mad! She sent me a text that I should come out that she was in front of my office. Thank God she was at the corporate headquarters at Ikoyi and not at my particular office. She has threatened to commit suicide thrice, drink acid, pour the acid on me, jump off from the third mainland bridge and some other murderous and suicidal thoughts that I just don't want to remember. This is how one moment of stupidity can alter someone's life forever. I barred her MTN from my phone, she has since called me or SmSed me at least thrice each with a multilinks, visafone, starcoms, zain, etisalat, one 09 number, and one
+44 number while she said she was in Lagos.

Ah! I have put this to prayers, asking Baba to forgive me all my sins since I was born, even the ones I am yet to commit. I have ignored her for 3 weeks and for the past four days, I have not heard from her. I hope she has not fulfilled her promise of committing suicide. I just hope she is tired of me or she has found someone else to torment.

I want to give it sometime, just to be sure she is gone, before I go for thanksgiving.

Part 2...The Final Wu....

2009-03-14T12:19:00.000+01:00

I have to increase my font size...a few of my peeps complained. Anything for you guys joo...for una to even come my page, I am blessed...

.....I was on my way to the lecture that morning, I saw Sunshine...I quickly crossed to the right side of the road and did a perfect eyes right. For someone who could not make the march past team in elementary and secondary schools because I could never ever get the'' eyes right'' real well..I was so proud of my eyes right. I was sure that the spirit of my dead PE teacher in secondary school was pleased with me wherever he was 'cos I felt a soft tap at the back of my head and a voice said ''march on, my dear son, in whom I am well pleased''
( i am dead serious!! lol)
She called out to me in that cheery voice I had come to yearn for.
I stepped on...
She tried to cross over;
I made a quick detour and headed towards the law faculty.
Later that day, because my phone was on silent ( i just bought a nokia 3310, that I was proud of..), I saw 17 missed calls from her and couple of text messages, asking me what was wrong.
Really, I felt bad, but my survival instincts had already kicked into overdrive.

Several weeks before, a very popular guy on campus was killed on the day of his final exams. It was a classic case of love triangle ( shebi, that is what it is called?) A young lady was with a member of a cult on campus, when she started hanging out with the popular guy who was a head Honcho at a rival cult. The campus was a ticking bomb waiting to go off because of the aftermath and effects of the tussle between these guys. Everyone was on their toes.. After several semesters of stand offs, there was a ceasefire and everything seemingly died down. The popular guy finally broke up with the girl and she got married to a popular aristo in town. The girl sef, she too like popular things..lol.
Then a session after she got married and two and a half sessions after the initial gra gra, the popular guy was shot dead..shot dead? no! Pumped full of holes, perforated in front of the school gates.
The girl was married oo!. All was done and forgotten..
But the guy who was scorned never forgot....

Sorry for digressing, but I told Sunshine that as much I admire Jack in Titanic, that I do not want to go down that road of getting shot up because of her. She called me all sorts of names...spineless, coward, twerp, schmuck, billyhead, eunuch..eunuch? what brought eunuch into the gist?
Anyway, I was on my way. I was almost ostracized by her circle of friends..well..I no send. I was not invited to their parties, etc
One day, i went to a popular hangout in town, Channel O, with a couple of friends. We were seated outside waiting for our shawama, when I scoped Sunshine, hand in hand with the warlord.
Aha! lol. She did not even spare a sideward glance at me.

To cut a long story short, the warlord was shot in the jaw, one time that there was some sort of fracas on the campus. He was flown out of the country by his family and next thing I knew, Sunshine was married to some other guy, an older papa for that matter!

lol....
Thank God, I trusted my instincts.
I went to Canaanland for shiloh..I think in 2006. I ran into her. It was nice seeing her 'cos we were both a lot mature now, and all grown up. She had 3 kids, and I was working. We talked about it and how I scampered away. She said she expected me to step up for her and I told her I had to run, to live and fight for another day...lol. She said she decided to date the warlord to get back at me. I told her, I refused to fight again after I found out she was now with the warlord.

I mean, wetin i for do?

Those guys ruled the campus and I was powerless,...well, almost powerless.

I am begining to get a hang of this blog thing. I am actually enjoying it. lol

Much ado about nothing.....

2009-03-11T13:54:00.000+01:00

Kai!! I have been away from my blog for so long. Instead, I have been jumping from blog to blog: Danny B's, Vera nwa mama, Shona vixen, London chic, bumight, all y'all. I just wish I am able to publish as constant as Danny does, or if my blog is able to draw as much people as Vera's.. well, I hope to get there soon, probably, get nominated for an award. even if I no win, lol.

Anyways,I was going through my mail box, searching for nothing in particular. I have had this mail box since the second semester of my first year. I saw some mails that evoked sweet memories; peeps that I was tight with in school and i don't even know where they are today. Probably chucked away in one corner of the earth.... Then I stumbled upon a cache of mails from my then love interest, sunshine. It was so funny how hesitant I sounded even while mailing her. I was very young and shy by the time I gained admission into the university...not even vast or experienced in that age old art of chatting the opposite sex up. lol. I remember I used to walk with my head down never looking at anyone's face. But this particular girl, I would prefer to call sunshine kept popping up around me, saying hi and smiling coyly sometimes and then on some occasions, coquettishly at me. This seemed to confuse me because as soon as i was warming to her shy, reserved nature, she comes all out and puts her hands around my waist or leans on me, with her boobs touching my back. Because I had never experienced any form of contact, (even though I had so much theoretical experience from reading all forms of literature...copies of playboy, penthouse stashed under my older cousin's six spring mattress, my mother's copy of every woman, which i spirited into the backyard shed to be pored over by my friends and I), i felt very exposed, enough to make her realize my dilemma. This led to weeks of unending yabis and snickers from her. Funny enough, I endured them happily. I guess that was love but those were my wonder years..

I remember when i was in my second year; I was bolder by this time...a few kisses and smooches during the night class...public display of affection etc. Then, one dude...one of them cult whatever, decided to pitch his tent with my now nubile sunshine. I put up resistance. They backed off...I celebrated; strutted around campus with the swagger of a college kid and a ball player rolled into one( forgive me TI for this unofficial remix). Alas, celebration too soon...they came back. Looking back, I think they were nice. They just cornered me at the multi-activity center, MAC, I remember i was wearing one white,..Kai! ... sparkling, pure, pristine white native. I was eating, and these dudes went to the stew pot of the mamaput, scooped a whole bowl of stew and poured it on me!

I Shrank...

They dragged me out, and almost the whole school saw me with this massive stew stain on me. After a heavy slap landed on my cheek, I was warned off sunshine, otherwise terrible things will happen to me. With all the stars circling around my head and some of them popping up on my blind side ( I swear, I saw some pink, and blue stars), I quickly agreed and sold my rights to sunshine for less than half a kobo. I quickly ran way before they go change their mind, descend on me..

Next day, I was heading towards my lecture hall...I saw sunshine, I quickly crossed over to the other side of the road.....

To be continued.

Christmas and all the drama: a one legged journey to self exploration.

2009-02-09T09:50:00.000+01:00

Hmm… I didn’t know it was going to be this hard when I signed up for this blogging thingy. It is almost six months since I wrote something. It is not like my life has been a bore; A lot has been happening. A whole lot, that I can't even fit into this page. Work has been something else. Life has been moving crazily fast. I have lost some, I have gained some.

A lot has happened in my city. The state government is clearing everywhere. Oshodi, Marina and the central business district. Those in Gidi know what I am talking about. It is a welcome development because the roads are very free now, especially Oshodi. The central business district + Marina were beautiful sights to behold.

Anyways, work has been crazy but fun. I wasn’t able to travel for Christmas. I felt bad because I have not seen my folks for almost 14 months. I was looking forward to some homemade food ( a'la ofe nsala and foo foo, chei!) but the thing never happened. So while peeps were shopping heavily for Christmas, I was looking the other way, except when I went for a coupla Christmas cards and some bottles of red wine. I actually worked on Christmas eve, Christmas day .

On boxing day, Y broke up with me.

LOL

Rude shock.

I came back from work on the 26th, (cos I worked the grave yard shift on Christmas day), spoke with her, then hit my bed. I woke up around 6pm to her text message telling me how incompatible we were and how she could not go on with me.

Did I hear incompatible? I was flabbergasted. I called and calmly (which was hard for me but I tried) tried to find out what the issue was. She never gave me a chance to talk but she rushed me of the phone and that was it! Chikena!

A relationship of two years ended with a text message?

Tacky!

From then on, my Christmas was a wreck. I love Y. That is the truth, and breaking up with me was something I didn’t expect from her at that time.

I went through the yuletide like an android. Barely knowing what I was doing. I remembered, when we used to talk amongst the guys…and we will say ‘nothing, if she goes, she goes…I will not feel it’’.. Lai lai. I felt it well. My work suffered, my general life suffered, my confidence went down. I had to pray to God to take away all the bitterness, anger and resentment that I felt towards Y.

After that, I was able to get myself back to normal.. a bit though. I will wake up in the morning and the first thing I would want to do was to call Y and say good morning. It was crazy because there were a lot of things I was still doing unconsciously. I will check my phone and no text message. At a time, I felt so lonely.

This one no be hard man.

By the 31st of December, I was getting a good grip on myself. I called Y at 11.10pm to wish her a happy new year. I guess she didn’t expect to hear from me, so she faltered terribly. She kept on stammering..and that gave me some joy. Oh! She is still feeling me.

After this particular call, she started calling me and telling how much she missed me and all. Meanwhile as soon as my status changed to single on FB, ladies started to holla! Me of all people? Ah! That felt good too.

On the 19^th of January, She begged for forgiveness. I accepted her back but I am still wary. Even though I am fighting this feeling of wariness, It still pops up once in a while because anyhow you look at it, she broke my trust. She said she was scared.

''Of what?'' I asked.

''Of nothing in particular'', she answered. Just scared.

Why didn’t you talk to me? Why didn’t you tell me..I am not a wizard and there was no way for me to tell you were scared because you were normal until you broke up with me.

Anyways, I am taking it one day at a time. I hope it works out, because It is so much stress to begin to chase another person. Lol

On another note, I think I am getting a hang of this blog thing. I just have to be dedicated, I guess. It is just that I have a bit of difficulty seeing things through..On a personal basis though. At work, it is a different ball game. I meet my deadlines with some time to spare. If I am able to translate my work attitude to my personal life, I will be good though. I am working on it though.

I have started work on one of my unfinished novels, which I left lying fallow for almost 3 years now. Kai..see the money the Mac Arthur foundation gave to Chimamanda. That is enough motivation for me.

Let’s go there!

What am I doing here?

2008-10-19T13:41:00.001+01:00

Why am I here?
What In Pete's name am I doin on this blog page?
I have asked myself this question over and over again. I have twirled it around in my head to point of dizziness. I have tried to douse this question, cloak it with excuses, yet it kept coming up at some odd times; trying to concentrate at work and up it pops up... ''what in God's name are you doing at blogger.com????''

''I woke up one morning and I felt like blogging'', I shot back.
''hmm.. ok. I hope you will keep at it, and not let it end up like those half finished books of yours, buried at the bottom of your red travel box...'', it taunted me.
Whatever!!. I try to get the voice out of my head as I respond to a customer's shrill complaining voice over the phone.

Come to think of it.. I was on auto pilot when I was signing up for this blog account. Didn't really put so much thought to it. What do I possibly have that I want to tell the whole world?
That I wish I were grey haired and green eyed?
I love the gunners fiercely..?
That i would rather stay in doors with a coupla books than to hit the bar?
That I was shy until I turned 22?
Who cares...?
Or is it that I am on a journey of self exploration, realisation and actualisation?
That I am on a guilty trip because I started another book while I am yet to finish the one I was writing before...even when I knew I was going to dump the second one too?
That I hardly finish what I start...probably this too..
That its likely I need help?